


Kun Mama

by BlossomingDia



Series: The Family Jewel [2]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Breastfeeding, Childbirth, Choking, Crying, Drug Withdrawal, Feminization, Figging, Forced Feminization, Gang Rape, Hand Jobs, Jealousy, Kidnapping, Kun is a Stripper, Loss of Virginity, Love Confessions, M/M, Mpreg, Non-Consensual Body Modification, Non-Consensual Kissing, Non-Consensual Touching, Painplay, Pet Names, Physical Abuse, Public Sex, Punishment, Puppy Play, Rape, Rape Aftermath, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rough Sex, Self-Harm, Sensory Deprivation, Smut, Somnophilia, Stalking, Suicide Attempt, Surprise Kissing, Torture, Victim Blaming, Violence, Virginity, Watersports, Whipping, a lot of crying, thigh fucking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-11-02 01:34:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 23
Words: 30,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17878586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlossomingDia/pseuds/BlossomingDia
Summary: Kun should have known that attention from a man like that could never be good news.





	1. Kitty

Kun pulled out his earphones as he walked through the door of the club. “Hey Kitty,” Lucas called from behind the bar, and instead of going back to the dressing room, he deviated for a moment heading over to the bar and taking a seat.

“Hey Lucas” he grinned and the familiar fluttering feeling rises in his stomach when Lucas smiles back at him.

“I told you that you can just call me Yukhei! Lucas is just for anonymity, you know what some of the people here are like.” He could only nod in understanding, creeps came with the territory he supposed. “You could tell me your name too, since were friends and all” Lucas suggested, though Kun just laughed for a moment “You know that’s no going to happen Lucas, you know were friends, but some things just need to stay in the club”. He got up at that point, taking the drink that Lucas had slipped across to him and knocking it back before thanking him and carrying on back to the dressing room.

He wasn’t even surprised when he saw the nurse outfit laid out next to the dressing table, he’d worn scantier outfits before. A bunny outfit last easter, a bikini during the summer and even a slutty Mrs Clause outfit a few months before to please the men who came in for their Christmas parties. He had to admit that it was almost comfortable for him when he slipped into the dress, buttoning it up as much as possible. Foundation, blush, lip tint, eyeshadow completed the illusion and finally, he slipped the blonde pigtails onto his head and strutted out onto the club floor after a moment of checking himself out and popping one of their “little pieces of magic” into his mouth.

He spied his usual clients as he finds his space on one of the stages, and they gravitate to him like he’s the sun. The bass blared through the speakers when the men has settled with their drinks and Kun felt his body getting light and hazy as the pill kicked in. It made it a little easier for him to relax, especially when they got a little handsy with him because being uptight in a place like Cherry Bomb could never end well. He began to grind sensually against the pole, putting on a good show and making sure to look up with lusty eyes as his fingers slip down to begin unbuttoning the dress. He continues, slipping off the dress entirely, and making sure to get close enough so that his patrons can slip their money into his panties and stockings. Their eyes are heavy in him and he makes sure to lean over, brushing his body against a few of them in hopes of enticing a little more out of their wallets, or perhaps, enticing them into a private dance to feel more of him against them. And then he sees him out of the corner of his eye.

The man was dressed too well for a club like Cherry Bomb, looking like every mans wet dream with his velvet suit and slicked back hair and, of course Kun was intrigued. Afterall, what would a guy like him want in a place like Cherry Bomb?

When the song ended, the man simply approached him as his clients dissipated and headed to the bar to bid on private dances. He slipped a stack of notes into his hand with a smirk and a sly little “looking good, mama” before resuming his position on the other side of the stage, away from the seedier patrons, and taking his whiskey into his hand and sipping slowly as Kun moved away, retreating back into the dressing room to wait for Lucas to tell him what to where for his private sessions.

He barely got a moment to relax before Lucas barrelled over. “Kitty! You’ve had sixteen men bidding on you at the bar, that must be a record or something!” he exclaimed “The guy who you’ll be dancing for is waiting in room five, and he’s booked an hour. He wants you in the swimsuit”. He just nodded slightly, thanking Lucas before slipping over to the rack, removing the swimsuit and changing into it, admiring the little tag reading “Kitty” on it with the little kitten before heading off through to the back room.

They’re all curtained off for privacy, giving the illusion that everything going on back there is perfectly legal, and there are no shady situations going on and he ignored the yelps coming from the other booths as he quietly entered into room 5, putting on his best smile and greeting his patron.

“Hey baby” he whispered, walking over and straddling the man’s lap “My name is Kitty, though I guess you already knew that”. He gave a sweet little laugh. The man relaxed underneath him immediately, allowing his hands to move up and rest gingerly on his hips.

He leaned forwards and nuzzled his face the man’s neck, feeling his pulse under his lips as he mumbled that they could feel really good together if he wanted, to which he just received a little nod and so he began to grind against the man. He was almost repulsed when he felt the cold sheen of sweat rubbing against his face as he kissed the man desperately, raising his arms just long enough so that he was able to pull the straps of the swimsuit down. The mans hands gravitated towards his exposed chest on which his nipples had become engorged and reddened from the pills. His mouth lowered, tongue brushing tenderly over the bud, and then-

And then Lucas burst in.

“Sorry sir!” he exclaimed, lacking elegance but no less enthusiastic “I have to ask you to vacate the room, since someone else has outbid you and has purchased the rest of Kitty’s time for the evening”. And of course hell broke loose, the man screamed at Lucas and almost immediately, the two security guards appeared dragging him away and out of the club. Lucas turned to him. 

“Your customer has left the outfit for your session in the dressing room, you should hurry up because he wants to make the most of his time” and straight away, Kun headed back to the changing room, raising an eyebrow at the pile of clothes waiting for him. Its simple enough: an oversized, pink soft knit sweater and a little skirt with matching pink stockings and garters. Though the clothes didn’t help when he stood in front of the man in the velvet jacket, in fact he’d never felt so naked when he was stood under that burning gaze. 

“Sit down” he ordered, and Kun didn’t even dare to disobey not feeling so sexy anymore even with the pill working on his body. He sat down next to the man, waiting for the next order. “You can call me…Mr Lee” he said, with that familiar smirk and Kun gulped, nodding for a moment before putting on his sultry, stipper voice. His “Kitty” voice.

“What can I do for you Mr Lee? After all, you brought so much of my time. There must be something I can do to make you happy…”

He moved down onto his knees, lolling his head down onto Mr Lee’s leg and moving a hand to his crotch, squeezing gently as a suggestion of what was to come though Mr Lee’s piercing gaze didn’t waver. Not even for a moment. Instead he reached down, pulling Kun up and planting him firmly back on the sofa “I don’t want any of that from you, ‘Kitty’. I just want to get to know you a little, afterall, you don’t seem to be like the others who work here.” 

Kun sighed internally, it was a shame that Mr Lee had turned out to be one of those guys. The ones that believed that they could get to know a stripper and pull them out of their “corrupt lifestyle”. Though he decided to humour him.

“Well, my name is Sicheng” he began “ and I’m twenty one. I began working here at Cherry Bomb about six years ago, when my mother died because my younger brothers needed to be supported and I felt like I needed to step up. Though originally I worked as a prostitute for a few months because I had no qualifications and there was no where willing to take me on as a member of staff being so young and all. I suppose that meeting Taeyong, the owner, was a god sent because we would have died on the streets if I hadn’t gotten this job and plus, everyone here is very friendly-“ He stopped. Looking at Mr Lee, it became apparent that he didn’t believe a word that came out of his mouth. Mr Lee leaned forwards, placing his elbows against his knees and looking him dead in the eye.

“Listen, I want to know about Qian Kun. Not ‘Kitty’”.


	2. Kun

As soon as Lucas’ voice called out for the end of the club’s hours, Kun practically ran back to the dressing room, missing the concerned look on Lucas’ face as he ran past. None of the dancers remained in there having gone home hours before because of the dwindling customers who had headed home because of the snow. He had only stuck around for his client, after all when a man like Mr Lee paid so much for his time there was no way he could pass on it. The sick feeling returned and Kun desperately scrabbled to collect his belongings and leave the club, wanting to put as much distance between himself and Mr Lee as possible. He turned, finding Lucas stood there leaning against the wall watching him in his frenzy before he spoke up. “What happened tonight Kitty? I’ve never seen you leave before the clients. I figured that something must have happened for you to just run out like that.”

Kun paused, contemplating whether or not to explain what had happened before deciding that Lucas would be the best person to tell. He took a seat, keeping his eyes trained on his lap. “The client knew who I was, Lucas. My real name, where I work during the day, where I live! I don’t know how he knew any of that especially because I had never told anyone about any of that!”

Lucas’ eyes widened for a moment, then he squatted down making sure to look Kun directly in the eyes. “Kitty, you should have come to me! I would've helped you out!” he paused “I guess it’s a little late for that now though. But I’ll tell the guy on the door to not let him in again, after all I wouldn’t want my favourite little Kitty to be upset would I?”

“Thank you Lucas”

“No problem, Kitty Cat” he grinned “Its late, I can give you a ride home if you want.” and Kun hesitated. On one hand, it was dark but with his encounter with Mr Lee hanging over his head it was probably safer to accept Lucas’ offer. Though accepting it could jeopardise the walls he’d constructed to protect his private life. 

“Sure” he agreed. Afterall, what would someone as sweet as Lucas ever do to him?

-

The ride back to his apartment was mostly uneventful, though not without tension with Lucas’ body drawn tight and his manner seeming jumpier than usual, startling when Kun spoke up and gently told him that he could pull over outside the building. He climbed out of the car, throwing a little thank you over his shoulder as he crossed the street and fiddled with his keys inside the lock though as soon as the door opened he heard the shout of “Kitty!” coming from behind him and turned.

He was stunned when he felt the soft warmth of Lucas’ lips against his own. It wasn't unpleasant, but the awkward clash of teeth and the rough drag of their lips together showed that while Lucas was enthusiastic he was perhaps not as experienced as he first thought. When they drew back away from one another, he felt breathless, unable to even stutter a word to ask why Lucas did that and what it meant. But Lucas beat him to the punch, his eyes shone with youthful glee “I love you Kitty” he whispered “I want to be with you every day, I want to be proud to show everyone that I’m yours and you’re mine too.”

“Lucas…”

“Please, just listen. I know that we haven’t know each other for long, but I’ve never felt so strongly about someone before. It makes me crazy when I see the way that the men at the club fawn over you and treat you like a piece of meat, and every time I see the way they behave I want to hold you and tell you that you’re better than just the attention of such scummy men.” He stepped closer. “I want to know you Kitty. As more than just Kitty, and if you want to know me as more than just Lucas, if you want that too then please let me know tomorrow.” He pressed a kiss to the corner of his lips, cupping his jaw gently for a moment before turning and heading back to his car leaving Kun, slightly dazed, under the light of the streetlamp as the snow flurry began to pick up.

He ascended the stairs slowly and tried to comprehend what had happened, unaware of the gaze that rested on him as he entered his apartment.

-

He could barely sleep that night and laid awake mulling over Lucas’ words in his head. The next day he found himself back in Cherry Bomb two hours before his shift was due to start, and he went straight to the bar, taking a seat and staring at Lucas for a long moment “Qian Kun” he stated earning a raised eyebrow.

“What?”

“My name. You wanted to know me as more than Kitty, so if you still want, you could know me as Qian Kun.” He held out his hand.

Lucas grinned and lifted the hand up to press it against his lips briefly “Wong Yukhei.” He returned “I’m very happy to meet you Qian Kun. I’d like to get to know you better if you’re OK with that, I know a nice little restaurant a few streets away if you wanna go before your shift starts. Like… a date! If your alright with that of course”.

Kun grinned at him “I’m pleased to meet you too Wong Yukhei, and a date at a nice little restaurant sounds great. If you want, we can go now so we have a little more time to get to know each other.” They set off, walking the few short streets to the restaurant and finding their own private corner to talk.

Across the city, a figure slipped up the stairs and knelt down, placing a little box and a card on the doorstep of an apartment before heading out onto the street. Undetected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I know it bounced about a little bit but I felt it was necessary. If you have anything to say don't be afraid to drop a comment but as always,thank you for taking the time to read the chapter!


	3. Xiaojun

The box was waiting for him when he got home, sat prettily on the doorstep and wrapped up in a ribbon. He bent down, picking it up and after a moment of inspection, he opened the envelope and read the card: _‘To Mama, we’ve seen that you have decided to begin a relationship with Wong Yukhei. We advise against that. If you don’t cease this relationship immediately then there will be consequences for both of you.’ _. A hot swell of panic rose in his throat, and he couldn’t help but throw a desperate look in either direction, paranoid that someone was watching him until a scribble at the bottom of the note caught his attention. _‘We’re not angry’ _it promised in childish scrawl _‘you’re just our Mama. I picked out a present for you and I hope you like it!!’ _. He cast a weary glance to the box which would have been innocent otherwise, wrapped in pink silk ribbons with a little heart shaped tag on it.______

_____ _

_____ _

Gingerly, he pulled the lid off and paused when he saw three rolls tucked into the box neatly. Tugging the first one out of the box he saw that it was a pair of underwear, made of sheer flowery lace and topped with two thin bows meant to rest at the tops of the thighs. He shuddered, tossing them back into the box before picking up the second bundle and unravelling it to find a baby doll intended to match with the underwear, and similarly he threw then back in the box before looking at the final bundle. It was a t-shirt. It seemed completely out of place when he looked at the other items, but the shirt seemed innocent enough and showed signs of frequent wear from how faded it was, and how it was saturated in the scent of lavender and sweat. 

___He carried it inside the apartment and contemplated what to do with it for a moment before going into the kitchen and throwing into the garbage._ _ _

___-_ _ _

___The next day at the club, he felt the eyes on him again heavier than usual and looked up catching Lucas staring at him from across the room. He spared a moment to wave slightly before going back to his dance. He ground his body into the lap of the man who was sat to the side of the stage and occupied the space that Mr Lee had previously sat._ _ _

___ _

___Lucas’ eyes felt heavier than before, and it didn’t relent even when he went over after the dance and pressed a little kiss to the corner of his mouth. “You have a dance with the guy who you were getting friendly with, he’s booked you for the rest of the night.” Lucas said “I guess you must have made a really big impression on him”_ _ _

___ _

___“Lucas” he began “You know that its not like that. Its my job to make sure that the clients are happy and I cant afford to not have this job”._ _ _

___ _

___Lucas didn’t respond. “Yukhei –“._ _ _

___ _

___“You should go now, he’s waiting in the back for you”_ _ _

___ _

___Kun hesitated for a moment before turning and heading into the back room. He pulled the curtains aside and greeted the client “Hey baby” he whispered “My name is Kitty, what can I call you?”_ _ _

___ _

___“You can call me… Xiaojun”_ _ _

___ _

___“Well Xiaojun, what can I do for you? After all, I’m sure you know what kind of business the back room entails”_ _ _

___ _

___Xiaojun seemed to stop for a moment and seemed to be admiring him. “I’m a virgin.” He stated “I would like to not be after tonight, if that is something you would do for me.”_ _ _

___ _

___“Ah. I can’t do that actually.” He grimaced “You see, my services are strictly hand jobs and perhaps oral if that’s adequate. If not, then I can go and get on of the others who would be happy to help you lose your virginity”_ _ _

___ _

___“No!” He shouted “I want you. I’m happy with oral if that’s what you’re willing to do”_ _ _

___ _

___Kun smiled up at him before nodding and falling to his knees. “Wait” Xiaojun ordered “I have something for you to wear, if you don’t mind” and he handed over a bag. Kun nodded again before standing and heading into the little bathroom that was adjacent to the room, though as soon as he saw the contents of the bag he did a double take. Pink underwear and a pink, sheer babydoll combined with a pair of heels and a little tube of lipgloss. He changed quickly after his initial inspection and flounced back out to Xiaojun who had leaned back on the sofa and unbuttoned his pants._ _ _

___ _

___“Is there anything that you would like me to call you while I do this?” Kun asked as he sank back down into the space between Xiaojun’s legs._ _ _

___ _

___“Baby”_ _ _

___ _

___“Well OK then baby boy” he whispered, then he reached down and pulled Xiaojun out of his boxers. He spent a moment just stroking it, working Xiaojun up to full hardness before leaning down and wrapping his mouth around it. Xiaojun groaned, and Kun took it as the indication to begin moving. His head bobbed rhythmically around Xiaojun’s dick. Lifting, falling to rest the pressure of his throat around it, then lifting again with a swipe of tongue, over and over again until Xiaojun’s hands wound themselves in his hair. His hands forced his head down so that his dick was sheathed into Kun’s throat and he momentarily flailed at the feeling of being too full with not enough oxygen, though Xiaojun seemed to get the message and pulled back._ _ _

___ _

___“Ish dat goog baby?” he slurred around it, looking at Xiaojun with lusty eyes._ _ _

___ _

___He didn’t get a response but the look in Xiaojun’s eyes as he pulled him off said everything. Kun pulled away for a moment to lick one stripe from base to tip and Xiaojun just groaned before he found himself releasing stripes of white all over Kun’s face._ _ _

___ _

___He reached up, wiping his finger through the mess on his face and pulled it down to his mouth, sucking it clean._ _ _

___ _

___“You think you’ve got another one in you? Or do you wanna cool down and take a shower?”_ _ _

___ _

___It took barely seconds for Xiaojun to stuff his mouth full again._ _ _

___-_ _ _

___He cleaned up and left at the end of the night and was completely unsurprised to find Lucas stood outside waiting for him with a cigarette between his fingers. “Was it worth it?” he asked_ _ _

___ _

___“Was what worth it?”_ _ _

___ _

___“Whoring yourself out to that client for the sake of a little extra money?”_ _ _

___ _

___“I didn’t whore myself out.” He snapped back “I barely did anything with him despite him asking for me to go all the way. You should know that especially since I don’t do that out of courtesy for you, since I said that you would be the only person I would be with like that”_ _ _

___ _

___“How can I know that? Especially since you said that you don’t wanna go that far, so for all I know that could mean that you don’t wanna do that with me Kun!”_ _ _

___ _

___Kun stared at him, feeling helpless and with the sick feeling of guilt building in his stomach. He approached Lucas and leaned up so that his lips met his ear. “If you want to know if what I’ve said is sincere, then take me home and find out for yourself” he whispered._ _ _

___ _

___The figure stood in the bus stop watched the two of them as they headed over to the car, and clicked the call icon on the phone in his hand, lifing it to his ear. “Hi, its me. I think I need to make a detour.”_ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read this chapter!


	4. Yangyang

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: rape and somnophilia

The second box was waiting at the doorstep for them when they arrived back at Kun’s apartment and he had to repress a sigh when he saw it looking as innocent as the first box. He pressed a kiss to Lucas’ neck “Why don’t you go on in and get things ready while I have a look at this” he whispered. Lucas’s face split into a grin and he spared a moment to lift Kun’s chin and place a chaste kiss against his lips before unlocking the door and entering the apartment. 

Kun sighed, picking up the box and examining it carefully. It was almost identical to the first, wrapped in pink silk ribbons though notably it was missing the card that was present with the previous box. He pulled the ribbon and lid off and startled when the contents of the box overflowed, spilling out onto the floor with the little note card sat amongst the mess. He picked it up and read: _‘Mama. Why do you continue to sneak around with Yukhei? Theres nowhere where you can go where we wont find you. If you’re in it for the sex then we’ve given you an incentive to end the relationship now.’ _At that point he stopped reading and retrieved one of the other slips from the ground, turning it to find a glossy picture of a torso. A tanned torso at that, rippled with abs and teasing a trail of hair that lead down to an area that was uncaptured by the angle of the photograph.__

__

__“Kun” Lucas said breaking him out of transcription “You might wanna come and look at this”_ _

__

__He shoved the rest of the photographs and the note back into the box, slamming the lid shut and carrying it through into the apartment and setting it down on the counter in the kitchen. “What is it?” he asked and Lucas just nodded through to the bedroom._ _

__

__Kun laughed slightly. “Have you done something special for me?” he asked “Because there was no need for that"_ _

__

__“Someone did something special for you but it certainly wasn’t me.”_ _

__

__At that his eyebrows shot up and he promptly pushed his way past Lucas into the bedroom, noticing immediately the shreds of fabric that adorned the carpet. The rest of the room wasn’t better. His clothes had been torn from their hangers and drawers and had been slashed into ribbons which were thrown about his room. His bed was covered in something sticky, and when Kun touched it and looked more closely he found himself recoiling with disgust. “YOU WERE WARNED MAMA” read the writing spray painted onto the walls and on the cabinet sat a little note. “You were warned Mama.” It said “Break it off now, or next time things will be worse for you.”_ _

__

__“Yukhei, I think we need to reschedule and perhaps call the police…”_ _

__-_ _

__The police arrived quickly and began asking questions, making notes on Kun’s answer before telling him that the matter would need investigating more and for the mean time he would have to find somewhere else to live. Naturally, he turned to Lucas with pleading eyes._ _

__

__“I would let you stay with me Kun, but I already share a house with five other guys and were already having to sleep together. There wouldn’t be any room” he told him looking genuinely apologetic._ _

__

__Kun thought about it briefly. “I haven’t got any money to stay at a hotel, so I suppose the only thing to do would be to go and stay with Sicheng for a while, though I’m sure Yuta will be angry about that.”_ _

__

__“But Sicheng lives over an hour away” Lucas protested “How are you going to get to work? And more importantly, how am I going to spend time with my boyfriend if he lives an hour away from me?”_ _

__

__“You’ll just have to deal with it, or else we break up, so it’s really your choice”_ _

__

__“Kun-“_ _

__

__“You could stay with me!” A voice chirped from next to them, and they both turned to find a guy who was a little shorter and younger than Kun stood next to them holding a bag of groceries. “After all we’ve been neighbours for six months now Kun, and I’m not exactly a stranger to you.”_ _

__

__“Thank you Yangyang but-“_ _

__

__“No buts old man, your job is important so you can just stay in my spare room for a while until your apartment is all fixed up again”_ _

__

__He considered it before agreeing “OK Yangyang, though I’ll try to get everything fixed as quickly as possible so that I’m not imposing on your personal space”._ _

__

__Yangyang seemed delighted and pulled him into a one armed hug, though Kun missed the smug look that was passed between the two men over the top of his head._ _

__-_ _

__Yangyang’s spare room was comfortable enough though it lacked the cosiness of Kun’s own bedroom despite his attempts to make it homely, though it still didn’t stop him from falling asleep the moment his head touched the pillow._ _

__

__He slept restfully until the found himself being stirred away by the feeling of a hand on his stomach. He stiffened slightly, frightened of alerting the person touching him of the fact that he was awake. The hand ventured further down and pulled at the bottoms that he had loaned from Yangyang, then inched them down his legs slowly, monitoring him the whole time to make sure that he wasn’t waking up. When the bottoms were pulled down to his knees, he felt the hand move to his thighs to pull them apart slightly, and within seconds he felt the heat and the weight between his thighs increase._ _

__

__The hand gripped his waist hard enough to bruise and the dragging sensation commenced. The heat moved backwards and forwards dragging against the skin of his thighs to an almost painful degree. “Feels good Mama” the person behind him whispered “I heard that you had thick thighs, but they feel even better in person Mama.” They turned his head and he forced himself to go limp and pliant allowing their lips to brush together and for the man’s tongue to slip into his mouth, exploring every inch and crevice of it and the kisses only continued to get more frenzied as the thrusts between his thighs sped up, dragging more and even brushing briefly against his balls. When the person released all over his thighs, he felt the finger swipe through it before it came up to his mouth and pried his lips apart and when they began to rub their release into his tongue and gums he had to fight the urge to heave._ _

__

__They cleaned him with a quick swipe of the blanket across his thighs and then slipped away and as soon as Kun heard the doors click, he hurried to the bathroom, leaning over the toilet bowl to vomit._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Sorry for the delay, the chapters might take a little bit longer to be posted now because I have quite a lot of deadlines coming up but I'll try to get chapters out whenever I can. Feel free to leave comments or give kudos, they make me happy and motivate me to write more. Thank you for taking the time to read the chapter!


	5. Cling

Yangyang was already awake by the time he dragged himself out of bed and was sat at the table idly scrolling through his phone while picking at a plate of what seemed to be undercooked eggs. He perked up as soon as Kun came in and sat down at the table. “Good morning Kun-ge” he chirped “Did you sleep well?”

“No” he muttered and Yangyang’s face seemed to fall slightly “I was a little sick last night, I guess that must be from nerves. I couldn’t stop thinking about my apartment”

“Well! I’m glad that’s all it was, you shouldn’t worry so much old man. Also if you go out during the night you need to shut the door properly or otherwise someone might break in. I thought someone of your age would know to lock the door at night”

Kun studied his face though the crinkle of his eyes and the turn of his lips as he laughed held no indication that Yangyang had been the one who had touched him. The door had been open too, he considered, so perhaps the person who broke into his apartment had also broken into Yangyang’s? He shook his head trying to dissipate the thoughts of the previous night as the feeling of sickness began to rise again. Perhaps it would be better to just forget it ever happened and dismiss it as some sort of strange dream, perhaps that would make it easier to cope with what had been done. 

“Yangyang” he broke out of his thoughts “Are your eggs even cooked?”

“I’m not entirely sure, they kinda burned on the bottom so I assumed they were done” 

He looked at them doubtfully. “Throw them away” he ordered “I’ll make you something else for breakfast, since I need to eat as well” 

Yangyang grinned at him as he began pulling food out of the fridge “I’ll take you grocery shopping as well, since you obviously didn’t get anything substantial last night. Seriously Yangyang you need to eat better or otherwise you’ll make yourself sick. 

“Thank you” Yangyang responded “…Mama” 

\- 

After breakfast, Yangyang seemed get progressively more clingy, feeding Kun bites of ice cream and eventually pulling him down to cuddle on the sofa for a few hours until he fell asleep on his shoulder. The hours slipped by as Kun watched trashy daytime shows on the TV and Yangyang slept peacefully, pressed against his body.Though eventually the time came where he needed to get ready to go to work.

“Yangyang” he called gently, shaking him. Yangyang didn’t even stir. 

“Yangyang, come on I need to go to work” he tried again, shaking slightly harder.

He shook even harder the third time. “Seriously now, Yangyang. I have to get going now.”

“But Kun you’re very comfortable, and I don’t want you to go” 

“Please let go of me” he pleaded “I’m going to be late”

Yangyang unwound himself with an unhappy scowl. “Promise me that you’ll cuddle m more when you come home and that we’ll watch a movie or something”

“You know I’m going to be late, you’ll probably be tired and ready to go to bed by the time that I come home.”

“Promise. Me.” He gritted out. 

Kun sighed before leaning down and ruffling Yangyang’s hair and finally linking their fingers together “OK. I promise that I’ll spend some more time with you when I get back from work”. He stood up and grabbed his bag from the bedroom before heading out into the night.

“Mama… Mama…” Yangyang sniffled, beginning to tear up when the door shut “don’t leave me”.

\- 

“BUSES ARE SUSPENDED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE DUE TO THE SNOW” the notification read on the board. “Shit” Kun mumbled looking at his watch, he had half an hour to get to work and without the bus he would probably be late. The only solution was to try to run to work and hope that he would get there on time.

He set off in a sprint towards the club, dodging as many people as he possibly could and trying to stop[ himself from skidding on the snow and ice. He thanked god that there were barely any cars on the roads because of the snow and there were barely any people for him to avoid. The sound of a scream had him slowing down. He looked around for the source of the noise as it came again as a piercing scream which seemed to be emanating from an alleyway where he could see a small boy of around five or six with his leg stuck under the dumpster. He considered stopping to help him but it was already getting late, and the darkness of the alleyway did nothing to calm his nerves, so instead he turned getting ready to continue to work.

“Hey mister” the kid called and Kun turned towards him “Help me please! I’m stuck!”

There was no way that he could leave a child alone in an alleyway. He approached him, trying his best to try and sooth the screaming child.

“Hey” he called gently “I’m gonna try to help you get yourself out of there, but I need you to calm down a little and tell me if it hurts at all. OK?”

The child nodded and Kun got down onto his knees, moving his legs slightly and tugging until eventually it was freed. “Thank you…” The kid called “…Mama” and Kun immediately stiffened. 

“T-take care of yourself going home” he stuttered as he tried to back away out of the alley slowly. Though it only seemed to get worse as he felt his back touch a large figure stood behind him, who’s arms wound themselves around him as their breath fanned across his neck.

“Stay, Mama. Let me show you how greatful we are”.


	6. Alley

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: this chapter contains descriptions of rape. If this is not something you are OK with reading then I suggest that you don't read this chapter.

“Thank you.” The man behind him told the kid as he handed him a stack of money “Go and get yourself some candy then go and meet up with Winwin-ge. Don’t get lost or otherwise we’ll get in trouble”

The kid nodded and buried his face in Kun’s stomach as he hugged him “I love you Mama!” he professed before skipping away out of the alleyway. 

“Were alone now Mama, and I just have to let you know how thankful I am for you helping my little one.” 

The man grasped his hands and pinned them together at the wrist with enough force to make Kun feel like his bones were breaking. He watched as a cable tie was secured around his wrist and was pulled tight, forcing his hands together into a cup shape and when he was dragged further into the alley away from the view of the street, his feet joined his hands being cable tied together and he was rendered paralysed as he was lowered to the ground. The man pulled piece of cloth out of his jacket and secured it to Kun’s face, though when Kun could see it properly he recognised it as a pair of mens boxers, which emitted a bitter, salty taste into his mouth when the fabric was shoved inside.

“This is punishment Mama” the man chastised “We told you once to break things off and you didn’t listen, then you tried to encite a sexual experience with Lucas Wong of all people?” He tutted for a moment as his hands came to fiddle with the buttons on Kun’s shirt. “So we did a vote between us and decided that if you were so desperate for sex that you’d turn to Lucas for it then sex is what your going to get. Even if this isn’t the nicest place. I would take you somewhere fancy, like the The Shilla if I could, I bet you’d be worth every penny…”

The scissors appeared at that point and Kun began to flail desperately as they were lowered so that the cool metal rested over his heart and brushed against the skin. The blades pointed down and in a moment of blind panic, Kun believed that this man was going to murder him in the alleyway where he could be thrown out like trash and never found. Instead, they began to snip at the fabric, cutting his shirt away first and exposing his bare chest to the cold winter air. Then they moved onto his jeans, cutting them away before moving onto his boxers so that he was completely naked on the dirty floor of the alleyway.

At that point the man began taking his own clothes off, beginning with his coat, then taking his bag off his back, then his shirt, then his jeans and finally his boxers. Kun began to sob.

“Don’t worry Mama, you're not gonna get cold. I prepared for this!”.

He reached into the bag at that point pulling out two folded squares of material. He spread the first one on the ground, revealing it to be a thick fleece blanket which he moved Kun onto and a second slightly thinner blanket was draped over his back so that it covered Kun fully as he hovered above him. “Comfy? I brought these cause I figured that you’d be cold. Plus I didn’t want anyone else looking at you.”

Kun’s body shook with his sobs as the man began exploring his body. Her started by cupping Kun’s face gently and seemed to inspect it like he was afraid that he would forget what it looked like, and when he was satisfied, he pulled the gag out and dipped down to press soft kisses against Kun’s lips making sure to slip his tongue inside his mouth as his hand grasped his jaw in a vice grip to ensure that he couldn’t bite him. He moved down, pressing his kisses into Kun’s neck and into his chest as he spent a moment to wrap his lips around each nipple and suckle on it gently as if he were a baby. 

Kun began to trash violently when he felt his dick beginning to nudge at his hole, they seemed to be testing the waters. “Have you ever done this before?” he whispered tenderly “I presume you have because of your job. Who would want to pass up on someone like you?”

He looked into Kun’s eyes and his mouth fell open in disbelief as he saw the unshed tears of desperation. “You’re a virgin”. 

He seemed to pull back at that, as if it was an outcome that he hadn’t expected and his expectations of their encounter had changed though he soon turned back with a face of renewed passion and drive. “I’ll just have to make it more special for you, and go slow so that you don’t hurt yourself. I haven’t got much experience either, but I’m sure I can make it good for both of us.”

His hands groped in the bag at that point and he pulled out a small bottle with a faded label reading “V Gel, Chocolate flavoured silky lube” and the man made sure to liberally coat himself in it before slipping a finger under the gag to rub it on Kun’s lips. The sickly sweet smell of synthetic chocolate filled his nostrils and he gagged as the man positioned himself at his hole and began to push forwards, gaining renewed strength when he met resistance from the unstretched muscles. 

It gave way all at once. 

The sound that ripped through the material of the gag was animalistic as Kun felt himself tearing from the sudden invasion into his virgin hole. The wet, burning heat trickled down his thigh as the man begin to move and a glance downwards confirmed that there was blood leaking out of him with every thrust upwards into his body. It barely lasted for a few minutes as a whole as the man seemed to twitch erratically with every bit of pleasure he derived from Kun’s body, and when he released he pulled out rapidly and promptly ripped the gag out of Kun’s mouth. He thrust one, two, three times and the bitter taste flooded his mouth again. 

The mand= hurried after that, throwing his clothes back on and cutting the zip ties with a last promise sealed with a kiss. “If you tell anyone or go to the police then we’ll kill Lucas and Liu Yangyang as well.” And with that he took off running out of the alleyway, leaving a shivering Kun in his wake who leaned over and promptly vomited against the side of the dumpster. His mouth tasted bitter with cum and tainted with kisses and synthetic chocolate. 

He crawled over to his wrecked bag, pulling out his phone as he pulled the blanket tighter around him and hit the first number in his recent calls.

“Hello?”

“H-help me…” He sobbed, collapsing down to the floor again as the blood tainted his pale thighs. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> As always, thank you for reading this chapter. Seeing all the comments supporting this story and saying how much people have been enjoying it was a really big motivator for writing this chapter, so an extra big thank you to anyone who left a comment for me on the past few chapters, they mean a lot!
> 
> Who do you think that man was? Who was the child? Do you think Yangyang is involved? If you want, let me know what you think is going on in the comments!


	7. Kunhang

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Discussions of rape and rape aftermath, also there are mentions of victim blaming(?)

No one came for him, and he ended up lying alone on the floor of the snow covered alleyway looking up at the dark sky above and silently preying that somehow he could just die. He hated himself. He hated that he had done something to attract the attention of the man who had attacked him, after all, it could only be his fault.

His fault. His fault. Only his fault. Hisfaulthisfaulthisfaulthisfaulthisfault. 

He fell asleep on the ground as the feeling of overwhelming emptiness swallowed him alive.

\- 

“Uh… Sir?” the voice crept into the corners of his hazy consciousness

“Sir” It tried again, and Kun opened his eyes to see a stranger leaning over him looking concerned “Thank god, I thought you might be dead”

“I wish I was dead” he whispered 

“Are…you OK?”

Kun remained silent, turning his head away to hide the tears that welled up. “Sir, I hate to ask something so touchy, but… have you been assaulted?”

Kun remained silent again and the man reached down to move the blanket slightly. He recoiled when he saw the blood that had long since dried to his thighs in the cold air, and when he looked closer at Kun, he saw the dried remains of his attackers cum splashed across his face. 

“We should take you to a hospital” he insisted

“No! No hospital!”

“Then we should take you to the police station”

“No police either.”

“Then my apartment, its just down the street and I can at least help you out an drive you home” He helped Kun up from the floor, wrapping the blanket around him tightly and taking his coat off so that Kun was covered more. He picked the bag up from the ground and held it on one shoulder while his other arm held Kun’s waist to help him as they limped slowly back to the man’s apartment.

When they arrived the man guided him to sit on the sofa “Wait here while I go run a bath.” He ordered.

“Wait”

The man turned and looked at him curiously. “What’s your name?” he asked quietly. 

“Kunhang” with that he turned and headed into the bathroom and after a moment Kun heard the sound of running water commence. It continued for a few minutes until Kunhang returned. He didn’t speak and only approached Kun to help him to limp over to the bathroom.

As soon as Kun was in the bathroom, he turned and left, allowing Kun to slowly unwind the blanket and allow it to drop to the floor before he slipped under the bathwater. Kunhang returned promptly and picked up a cloth that was waiting at the side of the bath, he quickly cleaned Kun’s face making sure that none of the dried cum remained. His hair followed suit, with Kunhang washing his hair gently, making sure to even use a jug as to not pull Kun out of the tight defensive curl he had assumed. Then came his body. The cloth was swiped over his shoulders, arms, back and when it came to his lower half Kunhang hesitated before pressing the cloth into his hands. 

“I’m not going to touch you any lower, but I’m going to leave the room so you can clean yourself up down there.”

As soon as Kunhang left and the sound of the soft click of the bathroom door rang through the bathroom, Kun felt the tears welling in his eyes. None of it felt real. It felt like some weird twisted dream, like it had happened to someone else that wasn’t him. His hand ventured down and touched his hole slightly feeling the raw abused flesh under his fingers, and he sobbed harder. 

\- 

Kunhang drove him back to Yangyang’s and handed over a slip of paper silently. “If you ever need to speak to someone about it, then just call me.” Kun just nodded and got out of the car, heading over to the apartment and going inside quickly. Yangyang greeted him at the door and threw his arms around him as he began to sob into his shoulder.

“Kun-ge! I was so worried!” He sobbed “I got a call from someone at the club saying that you hadn’t turned up, and apparently your boss is missing too. I got worried that something had happened to you!”. Kun hesitated, he could talk to Yangyang about what had happened he reasoned, Yangyang had no reason to hurt or judge him. He could trust Yangyang. He opened his mouth, then looked into Yangyang’s desperate face and promptly shut it again, choosing to wrap his arms around him instead.

“I’m sorry I worried you” he told him, resting his cheek against his hair “I saw a kid that was in trouble in an alleyway and I helped him out then walked him home because it was dark and I was worried he’d get attacked”

Yangyang looked up at him with big eyes and promptly laughed “Why am I not surprised. Afterall if you were to miss work it would be because of a kid.” Kun just smiled at him and unwound his arms, heading into the apartment and setting his bag down. “Hey” He called through “Do you still wanna watch that movie? I can make some snacks really quickly and we can watch something now, my treat”

“Yeah!” came the response “I’ll pick the movie and get everything ready”

A flash of colour caught his attention and he moved to look at it, finding a bouquet of purple and white flowers with a familiar heart shaped card. ‘I’m sorry’ it read.

The nausea rose in his throat. “Yangyang, are these flowers yours?”

“No, they arrived for you a little bit before you came home. Some guy with dark hair I think. It’s a cute bouquet though, they’re-“

“Peonies. purple and white peonies. My favourite flowers” 

“Maybe you have a secret admirer” Yangyang giggled, though Kun couldn’t help the pit of sickness that formed in his stomach. Kun pulled two out of the vase handing them to Yangyang, then he grasped a pair of scissors and proceeded to cut the heads from the flowers carefully before hacking the heads and stems into pulp and shoving them into a paper bag with the card attached. 

He just wanted to forget, and it would be impossible with the flowers living on as his reminder. His invitation for another encounter. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ohohohohoho!
> 
> I love a little bit of irony, see if you can spot it in this chapter! As always that you for reading!


	8. Breaking

That moment seemed to be the moment where everything turned around. The flowers continued to arrive whenever he wasn’t at home, gradually getting more and more elaborate and larger and larger with every day though Kun never saw the person delivering them. Yangyang also never seemed to see him and was only ever to describe him as a guy with dark hair and a look on his face that seemed to get progressively more and melancholy. Everyday, he would cut the heads from the flowers and put them into a bag outside the door, only to find it gone a few hours later. 

He broke up with Lucas too. Afterall, how would he be able to look him in the face and tell him that he’d never been with anyone else in a sexual way, how would be ever be able to bear Lucas touching him after what had been done?

Of course, Lucas had taken it badly, he’d turned up outside of Yangyang’s house every day yelling about not leaving until they spoke. He got thrown out more often than not, and on the days where he wasn’t he would sit there for hours outside in the hall. Kun stopped leaving the house entirely a week after the incident and it took longer before Yangyang came to him.

“Kun…” he said gently, sitting on the edge of the bed “I don’t know what happened on the day when you didn’t come home, and I don’t imagine that you want to talk about it either. But you can’t live like this! You haven’t left the house in a week, you haven’t showered and you’re barely eating either. I don’t know what happened but you need to stop feeling so sorry for yourself or otherwise you’re never going to be able to move forwards with your life.” With that he stood up and left the room, sparing a glance at Kun before shutting the door.

Of course Kun knew that he was right, he couldn’t just sit and wallow and so he sat up, unwinding the blanket from his body. He promptly pulled himself out of bed and put his clothes on, heading out for the first time in weeks.

\- 

He went to work that night, and the moment he walked through the door he felt everyone’s eyes on him. He ran his hand through his hair and pulled his glasses down to wink at some of the clubs patrons. He walked through to the dressing room but instead of wearing one of his usual outfits which boasted a sexy modesty, he opted for a red latex dress with dark smoky eyes and a long red wig. He didn’t even hesitate when he saw the pills and grabbed for the little tin on the table. One would get him buzzed and sensitive, one would be his normal dose, but nothing about this was normal which had him choosing three particularly appealing pills and popping them into his mouth. 

The rest of his night was filled with dancing, and partying with his patrons and when he was taken into the backroom, he let himself be spread out on the couch. He let the man touch him, he let him take and take and take more, even when there was nothing left. It continued for hours, with one man after another coming into his room and baring themselves to him. Kun had never felt so alive as he did then with the hazy pleasure of a man on top of him and the heat of the pills coursing through his veins. 

If he couldn’t be a virgin, he could settle for being a whore. He had nothing more to offer than his body whether or not he offered it willingly or not. 

It was almost disappointing when the night ended and the men left him sore and covered in fluids on the sofa in the backroom. He didn’t even bother to clean himself up as he put his coat on and slipped out in the dress he wore for the rest of the night. 

Lucas was waiting outside the club in his familiar position with his fingers wrapped around the same cigarettes and Kun almost smiled at the familiarity of the action. Lucas moved away from the wall as soon as he saw Kun coming out of the door. “Are we just not gonna talk about it then?” He asked.

“There’s nothing to say, we broke up because I couldn’t give you what I promised. If I couldn’t do that then I don’t see any point of continuing with our relationship.” He turned to walk away only to find himself caught in Lucas’ tight grip with fastened itself around his wrist. “Let go of me” he hissed “I need to get home”

“To who? To Yangyang? Cause he said that you hadn’t left the house in weeks and had barely been eating or sleeping either, then you turn up here and you’re blonde and acting like…”

“Acting like what!”

“Not like yourself.”

“Well coincidently, the old Kun is dead and buried and I need to move on with my life”

“Moving on with your life by drinking and taking drugs and whoring yourself out to whoever will pay for your time?!”

The slap resounded through the silent air and Lucas’ head snapped as the contact was made. “Don’t you EVER act like you know what is happening to me. You have no idea and you never will.”

He ripped his wrist away from Lucas’ grip and turned, walking away. He got home quickly and was greeted by Yangyang who looked tense he opened his mouth-

“Im going straight to bed” Kun hissed as he retreated into the bedroom

\- 

“Listen to me now – we can’t let him carry on living there, he’s very clearly depressed and going into a spiral after what happened and I’m worried that its just going to get worse from here on out.” The first voice said.

“He’s getting to be out of control, he let about 20 different men have their way with him tonight. Maybe you shouldn’t have done that” The second voice chided

“I know, I’ve tried giving him gifts as apologies but he just cuts the heads from the flowers and throws them away. I don’t know what to do anymore” The third voice whispered.

“Enough!” The fourth voice commanded “…I think its time to bring Mama home now, the world is becoming too cruel for him and he needs time to adjust properly…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> What are you guys thinking for far? Have any of the revelations changed your mind? What do you think lies in Kun's future? Let me know in the comments, because I really like hearing your theories and they motivate me to write more chapters!


	9. Addicted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: References to drug use

Two weeks after his return to the club, he moved back into his apartment. The walls were stained with red paint despite hours of scrubbing at the walls in an effort to remove it and the word “MAMA” hung around like a ghost that wouldn’t leave him alone. He bought new clothes, opting out of his regular jumpers, jackets and jeans and instead getting shorts and thin shirts.

He barely spent any time in his apartment after that point. He went to work, he ate out at restaurants with men that wanted his time, and he went “home” with his friends so that they could cuddle on a mattress together after sharing a needle. Kun had never felt so alive, he’d never felt so loved as he did on that mattress with Doyoung and Taeil held under his arms as they enjoyed the numbed oblivion that came from the needle. Yangyang and Lucas seemed intent on reaching him though, with one of them calling him every hour of every day though after a few days he simply turned his phone off. Why did he need a phone if he had no intention of going home or back to work?

Lucas found him after two weeks, purely by accident.

He had been waiting on the corner with Doyoung and Taeil, waiting for a date to come and pick him so he could get a little money for their fix. Though just as a man approached him he found himself being grabbed and turned his head, finding Lucas stood behind his with wide, wild eyes. “Kun!”

He stared blankly before Taeil and Doyoung approached and pulled his arm away. “Don’t touch him. Unless you’re planning to pay” Doyoung said. Lucas stared and then reached into his pocket, pulling out all of the money that he had in there as well as his wallet, which he promptly emptied into their hands before seizing Kun again and dragging him over to his car. They were silent as Lucas drove them back to Kun’s apartment and it only got worse when the door shut behind them and Kun fell to his knees, nuzzling his face into Lucas’ crotch. Most men liked a blowjob to get them warmed up and Kun was sure that Lucas would be no different to anyone else. 

He didn’t expect Lucas to grab him by his hair, dragging him back up onto his feet and sitting him on the sofa. “Where the hell have you been for the past few months?” He demanded.

Kun just shrugged and absently scratched at his inner arm “I’ve had a lot of dates, a lot of people wanted to spend time with me over the past few weeks and I got busy”

“So the fact that you’ve been living with two heroin addicts and prostituting yourself has nothing to do with it?”

“No! Taeil and Doyoung have never done anything, they’re my friends!” 

“Pull up your sleeves then” Lucas demanded and Kun immediate seemed to shrink into himself, grasping at his arms as if to shield them from Lucas’ burning gaze. 

“No.”

Lucas grabbed him again and yanked his sleeves, exposing pale skin dotted with red pock marks from the injections. He seemed stunned, as if the reality of the situation was something that he had never expected to happen. “Its enough, this is enough…its gone too far now” He whispered, seemingly to himself.

Kun never expected it when he lunged, wrapping his big hands around Kun’s neck and beginning to press. Kun flailed, feeling himself become dizzy and lightheaded the longer that Lucas pressed down on his throat. He batted weakly at Lucas’ hands trying to detach them but the pressure only grew until the fuzzy darkness that crept into the edges of his vision took over completely and he found himself passing out. 

\- 

Lucas picked him up and carried him out of the apartment. He hovered outside the door across the hall before knocking quickly, Yangyang answered promptly. He eyed Kun who lay limp in Lucas’ arms. 

“Did you kill him?” He asked.

“No, of course not” 

“Well that’s good, I would have been disappointed if he had died already before we got to play with him” 

“I’m taking him home now, thinks are getting too out of hand. I presume that you’ll be accompanying us then?”

“Of course.” He said raising an eyebrow “I’ll hand the keys back on the way down, there’s nothing that’s mine in there anyways and I’m sure the landlord will get rid of the food and stuff so that it doesn’t smell for the next time I have to use it”

“Probably” Lucas shrugged.

“Let’s go then” Yangyang said as he picked up his coat a few other items. 

Lucas carried him out to the car and spent a moment tenderly moving the hair from out of Kun’s eyes before wetting a rag with fluid from a bottle and securing it around his head as Yangyang got in the car. “What are you doing?” Yangyang asked as Lucas slipped into the driver’s seat.

“Making sure he doesn’t wake up prematurely, he’s gonna need all of the sleep he can get because the next few days are gonna be hell for him.”

“Yeah”

They lapsed into silence for a few moments. “Are we gonna go get the others?” Yangyang asked.

“I can’t fit them into the car with Mama in the back like that, so we’ll have to pull over and put him in the boot.”

Yangyang sighed. “That sucks”.

“Yeah, but we’ll be able to fit the three of them in the back then. I’m sure that Renjun wont mind sitting on Dejun’s lap for a while if we go get him from school”

“Of course he wont mind, as long as he doesn’t have to stay in school I’m pretty sure he would agree to anything. Are we gonna call him too? Its gonna take him a while to get home especially with _that one _trying to cling to him as usual”__

__

__“You call him then, I need to focus on driving, Yang ,after all we don’t wanna crash when we’re carrying precious cargo.”_ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> I've had so much fun reading through your theories on the last few chapters! Its very interesting to see how close y'all are getting to some of the parts that are coming up. As always, thank you for reading and if you want to, then spare a moment to leave a comment because I always love reading them and they motivate me to write more1


	10. Family

“Lucas!” The voice at the edge of his consciousness chided “Look at his neck! I’m gonna have to get Johnny out to look at him because I’m pretty sure that you’ve crushed his throat or something.”

“Sorry.” Came Lucas’ remorseful voice “I had to squeeze really hard to get him to pass out and I didn’t expect that it would bruise him so bad.”

He stirred and his eyes fluttered open, prompting a quick hushing of the small talk that filled the air. The voices all fell silent as he opened his eyes properly and took in his surroundings. Struggling slightly, he tried to sit up and immediately let out a shriek as his shoulders jolted painfully, he fell back onto the pillows that were behind him and the hot pain moved up his arms and settled finally on his shoulder blades. He took in the smiling face above him.

“Mr Lee?!” He exclaimed.

“Yep! You knew me as Mr Lee during out brief encounter in the club but my actual name is Ten Leechaiyapornkul. You will only refer to me as Ten or Daddy.”

He paused for a moment then his face split into a big grin. “Welcome to your new life Mama!”

stared with wide eyes then quickly spared a glance around his surroundings. He certainly wasn’t on his sofa anymore, instead finding himself lying on a narrow bed in a room with bright yellow walls and light floors. It was pretty much bare, only containing a small cupboard, a sink and toilet. The men who surrounded him were what really frightened him, as they stared down at him with such manic adoring expressions with one even reaching across to stroke his cheek tenderly. “Should we do proper introductions then? Mama wont really know his family if you don’t introduce yourselves.”

The first boy on his left seemed especially excited “Hi!” He exclaimed “My name is Renjun and I love you already Mama!” He was the child, Kun realised, that has been stuck in the alleyway on the way he was attacked albeit a lot cleaner and happier as he sat on the edge of the bed and tucked himself into Kun’s armpit. 

He recognised the second man as well “Lucas…” he whispered.

“Yeah so I’m Yukhei but I want you to call me Xuxi, Mama. Since y’know were not dating anymore so you don’t need any of that formality or anything…”

He began to tremble at the look that was on Lucas’ face. His eyes were alive but not with the familiar look of love that Kun had grown accosumed to they swirled with a look of desire and twisted happiness. 

“My name is Dejun, though I guess you knew me as Xiaojun… I don’t care which one you call me frankly, I’m just happy that you’re back home at last!”

‘Yangyang’ was next. “My name is actually Yangyang, so just call me that I guess. It’s so good to see you at home instead of in the spare room or in your crummy little apartment, I’m sure your gonna be happy here.”

could barely repress his sobs when he saw the next person in the line. He looked different, with big dark circles under his eyes and a melancholy expression. He moved and sat on the edge of the bed and cupped Kun’s jaw gently “I’m so sorry.” He whispered “I didn’t- I didn’t expect –“ his body began to shake with sobs and Kun recoiled from his touch as if he’d been burned. 

“Was it you? Kunhang? The one who raped me in that alleyway?”

Kunhang could only sob in response, but it told Kun everything that he needed to know. He began to thrash, ignoring the pain in his shoulders just to be able to hit Kunhang – to hurt him in anyway so that the bitter feeling in his stomach would go away. The others were quick enough to try and restrain him grabbing his kicking legs and holding his arms still though at that point he began to scream. “YOU RAPED ME KUNHANG! AND LEFT ME IN AN ALLEYWAY THEN YOU HAD THE NERVE TO COME AND HELP ME TO CLEAN MYSELF UP AFTERWARDS!”

In that moment Kun felt something break inside of him. “I’m sorry…I’m sorry…I won the Rock Paper Scissors for who would do it and I had to go through with it even though I didn’t want to…” He collapsed onto Kun’s chest and breathed deeply as Kun’s chest shook with the force of his sobs.

He could barely bring himself to stop crying after he saw the last person who was stood to the side of the bed, with a protective arm wrapped around him. “My name is Sicheng.” He said simply and Kun felt himself break all over again. Everyone in his life had betrayed him. His kind neighbour his boyfriend, his best friend, his saviour. They had all been tainted, pulled into a plot to terrorise him for unknown means and they had all gone along with it willingly.

“OK. Were going to give him a little while to calm down and then I’ll come back and talk to Mama about what’s gonna next. Everyone go and clean your rooms and unpack any stuff that you took with you when you left.” As if on command they all turned and left after pressing a small kiss to his face, and after watching him for a moment to see if his sobs eased up Ten turned and left as well shutting the door with a gentle click.

Kun screamed at his back.

\- 

Ten came back a few hours later, by that point Kun had long since cried himself to sleep. He felt nothing but numbness, mind melting numbness as Ten sat on the edge of the bed and watched him. 

“Are you done?” He asked and Kun only nodded slightly. Ten flashed him that smile again and Kun considered that perhaps in any other scenario he would have found Ten to be quite attractive. “I know you’re frightened, everyone is when they’re put in an unfamiliar scenario. Let me explain whats going to happen now. You’re going to go cold turkey and we’re going to help you through the withdrawals, then you’re going to go through our ten steps. If you make it to the end then I’m sure that you’ll be perfectly fine, if you don’t, then you wont be leaving this house alive.”

felt the tears welling up again but Ten only sighed, wiping them away. “Don’t cry, its not gonna help you. The doctor will be here soon so I’ll bring him down to check on you”.

This was hell, he realised.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> As you’ve probably seen, this story has been given a final chapter limit (though I might change it if I feel that there is more to be said.) As well I’m sure that you’ve noticed that the tags have changed, but I felt it was necessary to remove some things because they were no longer applicable to where I was taking the story. 
> 
> In other news, I have some more shorter stories in the works to with NCT and I might post them along side Kun Mama. These will have nothing to do with the plot of Kun Mama, and I wont be posting anything longer than perhaps three(?) chapters until Kun Mama has reached the end. If you’re interested in reading anything else I’m going to write then stick around.
> 
> As always, thank you for reading and leave you theories in the comments!


	11. Step One: Detox

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter focuses on drug withdrawal, if this isn’t something that your comfortable with then I suggest skipping it.

The doctor turned up after an hour or so. “Hello, Kun is it?” He greeted as he set a bag down, Kun watched him with curious eyes as he began to take out a few items from his bag “My name is Doctor Seo, but you can just call me Johnny if you like. Ive been asked to look you over and help you begin to heal yourself.” 

Johnny moved and sat on the edge of the bed, smiling at Kun warmly. “I’ll need to look over you in a minute to see if anything is damaged, though of course, if you don’t want me to do something then let me know. I need to ask you some questions first if that’s OK?” His tone was even and he seemed friendly enough so Kun nodded.

“What drugs were you taking?”

“Heroin” Kun whispered watching as Johnny began jotting in a little notebook. 

“OK, what happened to your neck? Was that from another addict or from someone else?”

“It was from Lucas, he choked me until I passed out.” Again Johnny was writing in his notebook.

“Last thing, I was informed that you were raped some time ago?”

“…yes” 

“Are you experiencing any pain from that incident? Have you experienced any bleeding?” 

“It’s painful, and it still bleeds sometimes” Kun replied softly, withdrawing into himself. 

Johnny seemed to cringe slightly at that but soon resumed with his mask of friendly professionalism. He called Ten back into the room for a moment and stared at him with a hard expression before reaching into his backpack and pulling out two bottles of pills. “These should get him over his withdrawals, its Lofexidine so its not addictive but he wont need it when the symptoms stop. It’s going to be bad because he was taking heroin like the other two, but it should only take perhaps a week for him to get over the worst of it. If he’s still suffering with withdrawal then let me know and I’ll come and check him again though seriously Ten you need to use them right this time, and if I find out that you’re giving him more heroin like you did with the others I may just kill you.”

Ten simply nodded and accepted the pills. Before heading out of the room again, and as soon as he was out of his line of view Johnny turned to him again. “I’m going to examine your neck and throat if that’s OK?” Kun nodded and tried to remain calm as Johnny moved and sat next to him, moving his head around gently and pressing onto the skin with slow and gentle care. He pulled back soon after and order Kun to open his mouth, checking inside of his mouth and looking at his throat before asking him to speak and breathe deeply. He sat back and began jotting in his notebook again before looking up and meeting Kun’s eyes. 

“Well good news, your throat hasn’t been crushed or anything but I’ll give you some soothing cream to help with the bruising. Breathing might hurt for a little while as it goes into the later stages of bruising, but don’t worry too much.” He seemed to pause as his expression softened “I would like to examine if there has been any damage from the rape, if your OK with that”

“No.”

“OK” Johnny nodded as he stood up again and began to pack his bag, though the sound seemed to attract Ten who cleared his throat and raised an eyebrow which seemed to drag a heavy sigh from Johnny. 

He put the bag down again and shot Kun an apologetic look before moving and pulling his t-shirt up examining his hips throughly and even pressing on his stomach for a moment before pulling a small machine out of his bag and plugging it in. He waited until the screen lit and quickly rubbed a little amount of a jelly like substance onto his stomach before rolling the small wand across his stomach. “It’ll be fine to go ahead with it when he reaches that point, theres room and theres no organ damage from the drugs. If you bring him to me then I’ll do it as usual”.

Ten grinned as Johnny packed up and headed out the door, “See you soon, hopefully, Kun.” And he left as quickly as he came. Ten approached him and leaned over, sparing a moment to touch his face and lean down to kiss him briefly. “I’ll go and get Kunhang to take care of you for the rest of the week, I have some business to attend to for a short while and you’ll need constant care until you’re over withdrawal.” 

\- 

Ten’s description of withdrawal as hell was nothing in comparison to the actual experience of it. He found that only a few ours after being left alone a deep ache settled over his body. Kun was uncomfortable of course but he never expected the pain that came when his muscles locked up completely. It was agonising and he felt like he couldn’t move or even breathe from the pain of his locked joints. All he could do was scream and scream until Kunhang came rushing in with Yangyang in tow, Kunhang desperately shoved the first of the pills into his mouth and sat on the end of the bed trying to stretch out his tensed muscles. 

“Don’t touch me” Kun sobbed, but Kunghang shook his head and continues to try and stretch his muscles despite his screams and pleas to stop the pain.

From there it only got worse, the lofexidine seemed to do nothing for him except ease the pain slightly so he could go to sleep. He found himself relying on Yangyang and Kunhang for everything from taking him over to the toilet when he was too weak to get up out of bed to feeding him broth when he was unable to eat anything substantial. On the third day, he threw up on himself during a moment of feverish panic and his humiliation only grew as they had to wrestle him into a collar attached to the bathtub to make sure he couldn’t run while they washed him down and Kun began to scream again at the sensation of Kunhang’s hands on his naked body.

Around day five the hallucinations began. No amount of soothing could calm him when the visions of a dark shape on top of him started. He could practically feel the weight of their body on top of his and their breath fanning on his neck as he fell into restless slumber again. The hallucinations chased him into his dreams as well and by the end of the seventh day he felt as if he had been put through the wringer. 

Suddenly it seemed to stop. He gradually became more lucid, he stopped sweating, his muscles relaxed and left only a deep ache in its place and finally his delusions receded into the cold reality of his new life with the people who called themselves his family.Kunhang put him into the bath again, secured with the collar around his neck and his hands cuffed to the taps, and washed him slowly and tenderly. It wasn’t bad he surmised, almost pleasant in the caring way that Kunhang washed him. He pressed a kiss against his wet hair.

“Congratulations Mama, you finished the first step” he whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ohhohohoho, two chapters in one day!
> 
> This chapter was kind of thought to write because I didnt really know too much about drug addiction and withdrawal, but I hope that I’ve written it appropriately for this chapter. This chapter felt kinda heavy and I cant say that the tone will lighten from here, but I hope that you’ll continue to enjoy the chapter.


	12. Step Two: Sevice (Part One)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Mentions of self harm and suicide attempts if that is not something that you’re comfortable with then skip this chapter.

Three days after the end of his withdrawal he was allowed to go upstairs, guided by Ten and Xiaojun who kept his hands chained behind his back. The new room was decidedly nicer than the last, with a four poster bed, a vanity and even a TV that sat opposite to the bed as well as the collars he had become too familiar with and a ring ingrained into the bedpost to serve as an attachment for the chain that was attached to his leg shackle. He’d been given such luxuries though he noticed that there was no door, and instead an empty frame served as an entrance to his room.

“It’s a precaution” Ten advised him “we can’t risk it again after the last time. You’ll be able to stay here for as long as you’re feeling sweet.”

They left after assuring that he was firmly attached to the chain though Kun saw that Xiaojun spared him a shy glance and a smile before he followed Kun and went back downstairs.

The moment that they disappeared from his sight Kun bent down and inspected the attachment in the bedpost, finding it to be a sturdy metal ring that was built as part of the bedpost, the chain seemed long enough to let him go anywhere he wanted in the room and was secured to his leg with a simple padlock that Kun figured he could pick easily if he knew how to do it. He sighed and headed in the direction of the door wanting to scope out his surrroundings past the confines of his room though as he approached the door he found the chain pulled taught and he was unable to move any further without protest from his ankle. 

Kun sighed and contemplated for a moment before deciding to head over to the window, perhaps he could discretely call or signal for help. Though as he pulled the curtains back he saw the thick bars covering the expanse of the window preventing him from getting out or even being seen from the street a short ways away. He touched his fingers to the window, wanting the cool touch of the outside against his skin and recoiled in confusion, lifting his hand he banged one on the window and realised – the windows were plastic to stop him from smashing them. It was useless, Kun decided as he slipped down the wall and leaned against the window, there was no way to get out of there.

,p>Suddenly, a glimpse of sunlight reached his eyes and he looked up finding the source of the light to be the mirrors in the vanity… The mirrors in the vanity! His mind cheered as he hurried over and touched them, finding cold solid glass under his fingertips. 

“Mama?” The call came from the bottom of the stares, alerted by his sudden flurry of footsteps and in a moment of blind frenzy he reached out, seizing the closest object which ended up being a decorative candlestick and swung it at the mirror- 

The sound of shattering glass rang through out the house and immediately he heard a flurry of footsteps coming up the stairs with a shout of “MAMA!”. As he turned, armed with a piece of glass he was met with the sight of Sicheng who looked pale as he took in the sight before him.

“What are you going to do with that Mama? He asked soothingly as he began to approach him as if he were a wounded animal or perhaps a child “You know you wont be able to hurt me with it so what are you planning to do?” Kun shook his head, trying not to listen and to instead steel his resolve ready to attack Sicheng.

“You wont attack me Kun. I’m your friend after all.” And Kun lowered the glass slightly, staring at Sicheng’s earnest expression before looking down into the glass and seeing himself reflected there. Sicheng was right he realised, he couldn’t attack him, after all what good would it do for him to attack Sicheng. He lifted his hands as if to hand the glass over and then began to slash wildly at his own arms hacking at them until Sicheng ripped the glass from his hands and clamped down over the cuts to restrict the blood flow. There was the pressure of a needle in his neck and he slipped away into the restless darkness.

\- 

As if on cue, Ten walked in and sat down on the bed with a stony expression. “I hope that you’re proud of yourself” he said, eyeing Kun coolly “Imagine if it had been Renjun that had checked on you how traumatising it would have been for him, though I guess you’d be OK with that considering how selfish you’re being.”

Kun turned his head and gazed at the vanity, the panes of glass now removed replaced with plastic sheets with reflective surfaces. “You wont be trying that again.” Ten assured “We’ve had to remove anything that you could hurt yourself with, so thank you for ruining everything for everyone.” He got up at that point, heading back towards the door before stopping. “I suggest that you go to sleep. You’re going to need energy to start step two later on.”

\- 

Step two, he found, involved cooking and cleaning. “You need to learn the role of a mother, and that means being able to serve your family. So you’re going to be cleaning the house from top to bottom, and cook lunch for when the boys come home at one o’clock as well as dinner for later this evening”

Kun stared “And if I refuse to serve?”

“If you refuse?” Ten repeated as he contemplated the question “well, disobedience means punishment and if your that intent on not serving then I could take your punishments and inflict them onto Renjun as well. That might get through to you.”

Surely, he thought, Ten wouldn’t do anything to hurt Renjun especially considering how much he seemed to dote on him. Though something in Ten’s grin suggested otherwise and so Kun found himself accepting the sponge and beginning on the dishes, for Renjun’s sake if nothing else.

It took two hours to clean the kitchen to a state where he would actually call it acceptable, and by that time one o’clock was nearing. Hotpot would suffice to feed so many boys for lunch, and would allow him to avoid Ten’s wrath by not having lunch by having lunch prepared quickly. Like clockwork, the boys cam through the door at exactly one o’clock and pressed a kiss to his lips before taking their place at the table and digging into the hotpot which had been laid out ready for them.

Kun went to sit, intent on eating some hotpot to ease his aching stomach though his arm was caught by Ten. “What do you think you’re doing?” He asked.

“Eating some of the hotpot?”

“No you’re not”

“Yes, I am. I’m hungry and I deserve to eat the food that I made!”

“Did I stutter? You’re not eating until the boy’s have finished their meal, then you may have whatever is left. It’s not like you need it anyways.”

“But-!”

“Are you being disobedient?” He asked casting a cool glance towards Renjun who was happily eating his food at the table. Kun only swallowed before shaking his head and beginning to clean up the dishes from making the meal.

“Boys” Came Ten’s voice, obviously tinged with annoyance “How many times do I have to tell you to lock that door?”

“Wash te point off wocking it if were jush gonna go ouwt ‘gain?” Dejun slurred around a mouthful of food and the lightbulb went off in his head.

\- 

It took a further week of quiet service until he worked up the nerve to try his plan. He had watched for a week, when the boys came home for lunch, what they did during lunch, and how Ten moved him from to move.

“I’m finished in here” He said meekly, looking up from his eyelashes at Ten who grinned and pulled him into a kiss. Ten leaned down and unlocked the chain from the hook, guiding him into the lounge with a hand on the small of his back. It was his only chance!

As soon as they were out of the line of vision of the other boys, Kun raised his arm and drove his elbow into Tens face, not caring where the hit landed as long as it was enough to incapacitate him before he took off running, the chain dragging behind him as he dashed for the door. “GET HIM” Ten yelled grasping at his bloody nose as the others rushed from the table and lunged at Kun, managing to catch the chain and pull him to the floor as he opened the door.

Sicheng hurried Renjun into the bedroom and locked the door, turning in time to see Ten’s furious figure, shaking and brandishing Renjun’s baseball bat which he’d brought home from school. “HOW MANY TIMES TO DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU!” He shouted and swung.

Kun screamed as he heard one, two, three, four cracks and the pain shot up his legs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi
> 
> There wont be a chapter released tomorrow because I have a Spanish exam on Thursday. I will try to get a chapter done on Thursday after the exam but i have another exam on Friday, so I’m not going to promise anything before Friday night. Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy the chapter.


	13. Step Two: Service (Part Two)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Descriptions of rape, if you're not comfortable reading this then avoid this chapter

“…So you broke his legs!” Came Johnny’s angry voice from somewhere below him on the bed. He could faintly hear the cries of one of the others before Ten’s voice cut in.

“Shut up. You know that he deserved what he got.” The sobs only got louder and Kun heard the resounding slap as it was delivered, effectively silencing the crier. “Repeat after me. He deserved what he got because he should know better than to try and run.”

“H-he…He deserved what he got…” came the shaky voice “…because he should know better than what he got”

Johnny huffed at that point and moved to check his vitals and blood pressure, before turning back to Ten “He passed out from the shock of having his bones broken, but he seems to be coming down and will probably wake up soon.” He paused, and Kun felt the weight of his gaze. “The x-rays are showing that each leg is broken in at least four places, and I’ll probably need to operate on them to realign the bones and make sure they’ll heal properly”

“Do what you need to – but I want you to put it in while you’re fixing his legs”

“Ten. No.” 

“Are you in any position to refuse?”

“Ten, it might cause further complications, and plus its not going to make a difference to wait for a few months until his legs have healed”

“Johnny, you’ll put it in or I’ll happen to swing by the police station and you might come up in some conversations that I might have with an officer.”

“Fine.” He said and through the small crack in his eyelids Kun saw that Johnny’s stance had changed, becoming more tense and holding himself as if it took every inch of his being to not hit Ten “I’ll give him some anaesthetics and make sure he’s out then I’ll go and fix his legs.”

The silence resounded as Kun felt the needle enter his hand and he slipped away out of consciousness.

\- 

He woke up some time later to a weight on his chest and looked down to find Yangyang sleeping soundly against him, tucked gently into his armpit with his hair splayed across the expanse of Kun’s chest. It was a shame, he thought, he was quite pretty when he was asleep. He lifted his hand and brushed a strand of hair away from Yangyang’s face only to catch himself and retract his hand as if he had been burned.

The cages caught his eye and he looked down to find them secured to both of his legs which were bruised and swollen underneath the structures. Struggling, he tried to sit up only to be met with a wave of pain across his stomach which caused him to fall back against the bed, disturbing Yangyang. “Mama?” He asked blearily as he sat up slightly and was met with the sight of Kun tearing at his hospital gown. 

“Mama, no!” He cried grasping at Kun’s hands to stop them “Ten! Ten!” 

Johnny burst in with Ten in tow, looking far too casual for the circumstances.

“Hey hey hey, calm down Kun” Johnny soothed holding onto his frantic hands and pinning his wrists together “You don’t need to look, I just had to repair some internal damage you got when you fell.” Kun stopped and gazed at Johnny with wide eyes. “You’ll be perfectly fine” he assured, lying him back against the pillows before turning to Ten with the same hard expression. 

“If you’re intent on carrying on with this then give him about a week for it to heal and then be gently with him, I’ll come back and put casts on his legs in a few days which should help them to heal with the bones in place.” He tried to give a reassuring smile but Kun could see through it, seeing instead the troubled expression hidden behind the façade of happy reassurance. 

Ten leaned over him “Don’t you ever try to run again, got it?” He grinned for a moment and pulled back to kiss him gently. “We’ll carry on in a few days, with the other part of learning to serve. You might want to prepare mentally for it, because it’s the part that comes when you refuse to submit to your family like you should.” 

\- 

Ten’s warning became all too clear days later, when his legs had been put into the casts and he was moved onto a bigger bed without warning and chained as usual. He had been sceptical but figured that perhaps, it was to give him more room with his legs needing to be positioned in the way Johnny suggested would help. Though it became suspicious when he saw the downtrodden expressions on the boy’s faces as the hurried Renjun away with Sicheng and Yuta and began to strip him naked. 

“What’s happening?” He asked quietly “Am I getting another bath?”

None of them answered him and instead just took what they needed and left him alone in the room – until the men began to file in. Strangers, all of them, but the way that they looked at him made him feel sick to his stomach especially as more filed in until there was no room for any more inside of the room. Then they began queuing outside of the door, talking jovially amongst themselves as the ones inside began to touch whatever flesh was available for them, rolling his nipples between their fingers and one of them even going as far as to dip their tongue into his bellybutton. Clothes were removed rapidly and as they began to stack bills on the bed side table Kun realised – when Ten meant service he meant sexual service. Ten had pimped him out.

They swarmed around him, casually discussing who was going to go first until one particularly outspoken man pushed through the crowd and crawled onto the bed barely minding Kun’s legs. He leaned forwards and forced his tongue into Kun’s mouth as he rubbed his dick against Kun’s hole, the taste of tobacco filled his mouth as he felt the harsh press of the mans dick against his hole until it gave way and he sank in all the way. “Please stop” he sobbed as it began to move inside of him, carving him out and retreating over and over

“Damn You coulda lubed him up a little” another laughed from somewhere next to the bed.

“Fix that then, lube yourselves because he feels really fuckin good”

They nodded and snatched the bottle of lube from the bed side table, and forced his chained hands open in order to pour some lube into each palm. The manipulated his hands into loose fists, delivering a stinging slap when he tried to pull away or change position and shoved into the tight tunnel of his hands, slicking them with Kun’s improvised handjob. “Moooove” came the whine from a shorter looking man who muscled his way forwards and tried to jostle one of the others out of the way only to be pushed back again.

“If you wanna have a go at him, his mouth looks really pretty”

His face was mounted in seconds, stuffed full of the disgusting weight of the man’s dick. It was only worsened when he felt his nose close off, causing his throat to spasm wildly. “Feels good” he grunted “I think I might be done with you soon”. Kun sobbed at his words only be shushed as he leaned forwards “Don’t worry baby, there’ll be plenty of others to make you feel really good inside…”

Kun closed his eyes and prayed for it to be over as he felt the men coming and going, finishing inside of him, on his face and in his mouth and when it eventually ended, with his body sticky and covered in the burn marks of numerous cigarettes, he felt disgusting and used. He was disgusting, used up and he thought , in that moment that moment, that no one could ever want something as disgusting as him. 

The boys were so gentle when they came back. Dipping their fingers inside of him to clean the cum out of him, running a soft rag across his face and hands until they were clean and even giving him a small mouthful of mouthwash to wash the disgusting taste out of his mouth. The lay with him afterwards, and their touch made him feel safe for the first time in a long time. “You were wonderful Mama” they whispered “You were beautiful, and you took the burden so well. You really are meant to be a mother…”

He understood then, what Ten had meant about how being sweet would let him live happily with the boys. If he would be able to live happily with his boys, he could learn to be sweet. He could learn to be their Mama.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uwu I'm back!
> 
> Its been a stressful few days, but now that my work load is easing up I should be able to continue posting chapters again. I'll be posting a new fic in the next two days, so if you're interested in a little bit of dark Markhyuck then maybe check it out ~
> 
> Thank you for reading as always1


	14. Stage Three: Confession (Part One)

They moved him back to the bedroom upstairs after his ordeal with the men, and as they laid him back down onto the fresh white linen Kun stared at them with dark eyes and whispered for them to take him back to the other room because he wasn’t worthy to sleep on something so beautiful and unspoiled. They just kissed him again, like it made everything better and every one of his problems could be solved with a simple little kiss. 

He had long since stopped rejecting the kisses, figuring that if Ten would break his legs then he would have no problem breaking his jaw if he rejected the kisses. 

Ten came to him a few days later with Johnny in tow, who didn’t even talk to him when they were left alone, instead choosing to inspect his legs and check his stomach before giving Ten the all clear and leaving, and it felt in that moment as if every trace of happiness – no matter how small it was – had been ripped away, leaving in place only loneliness and fear. Ten sat at the edge of the bed, facing him for once with an expression of genuine warmth. “The boys have told me that you’re responding well to everything now. I’m proud of you!” He beamed “I can tell that you’re finally getting that this is your true purpose, and your accepting our love.” 

Kun just lay there silently, looking through Ten at the light filtering through the window as he continued “We’ll start Stage Three soon, and it won’t nearly be as bad now that you’ve learned that your place is to serve and not as too many questions.”

\- 

He found himself bound to a post in the middle of a room with high windows that let the light stream over his naked body. They’d been kind that day and given him a cushioned mat to kneel on to protect his legs from the hard wood flooring. 

The boys sat in a semi-circle around him, on chairs like a jury waiting to see an execution. Ten stepped forwards and knelt in front of him, lifting his chin so their eyes met. “For Stage Three, you have to confess you’re wrong doings or otherwise, you’ll never be able to move forward and be the better version of yourself. We’re not hypocrites and we get that we’ve made mistakes as well, so we’re all going to confess ourselves to you and you will accept the burden of our confessions through receiving the punishment for them. We’ll go slow, in age order only hearing a few a day and finally, you’ll confess and be free from the constraints of the identity of Qian Kun.”

Ten straightened up and clapped his hands together with a small smile. “You remember how this goes right? Would one of you like to explain?”

His look was pointed at Sicheng who stood with a stoic expression. “We go up one by one, and confess. Then we stop and discuss what the punishment will be based on the weight of the confession”

“Good, thank you for the reminder Sicheng. Now lets begin!”

He moved in front of Kun and kneeled in front of him, looking him dead in the eyes. “My name is Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul.” He began “And this is my confession to you”

“I have committed murder, and thrown people away like they’re trash. I have blackmailed and hurt my friends. I forced someone to have my child, and then killed them after suffocating the baby with a pillow.” He paused for a moment and assessed Kun’s expression, taking in the despair and hopelessness that flooded his features at the mention of a child’s death “Perhaps my biggest confession is that I have fallen in love, over and over, but none of them have lasted until I was introduced to you for the first time”

He stood at that point signalling the end of his confession and he turned back to the boys behind him who conferred quietly before standing to deliver their deliberation. “We believe that the weight of the punishment is 30 lashes with a whip, so that you can under the sufferance that you have inflicted onto others.” Ten nodded and turned to a small table on the other side of the room, selecting a black object and holding it up for Kun to look at. It was a whip, black and made of braided leather, perhaps about 12 inches in its entirety he observed as Ten wound it and moved to stand behind him after placing a wooden block inside of his mouth. “Thank you Mama, for accepting me despite my flaws and faults.” He said quietly as he raised the whip high and with all his might brought it down on Kun’s shoulders. 

His body jumped and tried to flinch away from the source of the pain, while his mouth reflexively tensed to try and conceal his scream only for his teeth to wedge firmly into the wooden block as the blows continued, feeling like a knife being run over his skin. He felt his skin tear at the eighth blow, with the rivulets of red blood rolling down his back and puddling around his legs. At the fifteenth blow, he thought he was going to pass out. His back felt like nothing more than a bloody pile of much, torn and ripped in every way. Though as he began to slip out of consciousness, the whip moved, caressing his ass for a moment before resuming the assault on the soft skin until it too was nothing but bloody pulp. 

Ten kissed him when he was finished, and wiped the sweat, tears and spit away from his face as he sobbed from the crippling pain that wracked his body. “Thank you, Mama” He said one more time before retreating and taking the place of Sicheng who rose and moved to kneel in front of him. 

“My name is Dong Sicheng, and this is my confession to you. I betrayed my family and had sex with a man outside of wedlock behind their backs. I have a child, but chose to abandon them when they were a baby which was no ones fault but my own. I deceived you and pretended to be you’re friend.”

“We believe the weight of the punishment of abandoning a child is worthy of birthing three objects, roughly equivalent to the size of a premature baby so that you can understand what pain goes into bringing a child into this world, and why it must be respected.” And so the prep began, Sicheng coating him in lube and slipping his fingers in gently to stretch out his walls without tearing him, before he began with any of the objects, he raised a little tub to Kun’s nose and had him inhale deeply. Kun allowed himself to relax and melt into the warm tingling sensation of what he had inhaled as he felt the pressure of the first object against his hole.

The first object was small, presenting itself as a little plastic basketball, like the cheap ones that were given to children when they played mini basketball. Sicheng didn’t hold back as he slicked it up and began to push at it gently, forcing Kun’s hole to spread and slowly accept the intrusion until it was held tightly by his muscles. “Push it out.” Came the command and Kun pushed gently, unsure of how to approach doing so until the ball popped out and rolled a short ways across the floor.

The second item was a pepper which was larger than the ball, but came out with only a little bit of effort from Kun’s loosened muscles.

The last object posed a problem. It was a buttplug, slim looking with a rubber tube coming out of it. It slipped in with relative ease, sitting snugly against his walls and feeling almost good in comparison to other things that had been in his ass – until Sicheng pushed down on a little pedal by Kun’s leg and he felt it inflate, becoming slightly larger than before. It wasn’t entirely unpleasant, he thought, the stretch felt nice and he wasn’t in pain because of the preparation, which was more than he’d normally get. Though as Sicheng continued to step on the pedal Kun felt himself stretching to impossible limits, first to the size of a fist, at which point Sicheng stopped briefly and inspected his hole, which was stretched wide around the plug, for any signs of tearing before continuing to the size of a shotput ball which pushed heavily on Kun’s walls. Forcing them ever outwards until he was stretched to about the size of a baby. “Push it out” they commanded and he tried his best, straining hard and breaking out into a cold sweat as he desperately tried to dislodge the plug from his insides. 

After about ten minutes, they seemed a little bit fed up and Lucas stood to promptly deliver a swift kick to Kun’s stomach which had the plug popping out in mere moments and the release of the incredible pressure inside of his organs had Kun slumping to the floor on the edges of his consciousness, blissed out and stained with his own release. 

“OK that’s enough for today, we’ll hear more confessions tomorrow. Come and help me to clean Mama up and get him into bed so he can rest for tomorrow…”


	15. Stage Three: Confession (Part Two)

They got Johnny to stitch up his cuts from the whipping, and rubbed cream into the stretched muscles of his ass to fix him up before they reconvened the next morning to carry on with their confessions. Lucas stood first and assumed the position in front of him. “My name is Wong Yukhei and this is my confession to you.” He began “I’ve killed people in so many horrible ways, I used to do it for money to start with, then I did it because people told me to do it for the good of others, then it just felt good to be in control for once. I’ve lied to those who’ve trusted me and done some really fucked up things at the insistence of others.” He stopped and went to stand again only for Ten to interject “Yukhei. You’re confession isn’t done. Sit back down and finish you’re confession or otherwise you’ll be removed”

Yukhei slowly sat back down and lowered his head to finish his confession “I sold drugs to people I knew could never afford to pay for them, and I pimped myself out when my boyfriend said it was the only way to pay back what I had done.” He looked to Ten with what looked like desperation and earned an approving nod in return, which flooded his features with happiness for a moment as he stood up and got ready for his punishment to be decided. 

Xiaojun stood and cleared his throat quickly “You’ve allowed yourself to be led by others and taken advantage of like a puppy, therefore we’ve decided that your punishment must be becoming that vulnerable puppy so you can see yourself how others did.” And with the delivery of the sentence Yukhei nodded and moved to the table, picking up a few objects and bringing them back to the center of the room to show them to Kun. First, the headband was slipped onto his head giving him two little ears that protruded from his dark hair. Lucas moved behind him and with a quick swipe of lubrication, pushed the plug forwards until his hole swallowed it in its entirety. The soft curled tail protruded from his hole as if it has always been there, and it wagged slightly from slide to side with every movement of his hips. The collar was secured to finish the look, made of solid leather and patterned with a sweet smattering of flowers. 

The others murmured their approval of his look and Lucas even had the nerve to lean close and whisper “We borrowed the collar from a good friend of yours” before retreating back to his seat.

Xiaojun rose to take his place. “My name is Xiao Dejun, and this is my confession to you. I vandalised your apartment and made sure that you had to go and live with Yangyang. I went against the wishes of my family more than once, and decided to meet you before it was time. I fell in love with you, like the others but I was going to set your apartment on fire and take you for good, where no one would ever find you. And I gave you naked pictures of my self when the box was delivered at your house”

“Such burning passion has led you to betray others and pose a serious threat to the safety of Mama, and the happiness of this family. Therefore we’ve decided that the punishment must be akin to burning passion, and your punishment is to face ten minutes of figging, and as well you must rub the erogenous zones of your body with a chilli to understand the consequences of burning passion”

Dejun simply nodded but Kun could see the dark excitement in his eyes as he went to the table and extracted a ginger root and a chili from the cooler. He watched Kun squirm uncomfortably as he peeled the skin from the ginger and carved it to be wide and tapered on one end but thin and long on the other, then he sliced the top from the chilli and cut it down the middle before approaching. He pulled the curled tail plug out of him and hummed appreciatively before replacing it with the tapered ginger root. Kun clenched reflexively before turning and looking at hi “Why have you put that in me?”

“Shhhhhh” Dejun warned “Good puppies don’t talk”

“But-“ 

Dejun slapped him across the face. “Good puppies don’t talk.” He repeated firmly and Kun simply lowered his head and stared at the floor as Dejun’s hands began to explore his body. Rubbing the chili in his hands over his nipples first, ensuring that he rolled and tugged on them slightly before moving down and rubbing it lightly on his belly button, introducing the creeping feeling of heat there too. As the chili moved to his dick, Kun felt an intense prickling heat start in his hole, it crept up his lower back and Kun recoiled reflexively, clamping down on the ginger in an effort to eject it from his body. Dejun laughed at him, softly at first and then louder as he watched Kun’s eyes prickle with tears from the increasing sensation of pain travelling through his body.

He burned, and Dejun only watched with glee, swiping the chili over the head of his dick, his balls and finally his perineum before returning to his seat and watching as Kun writhed in agony. Every second felt as if he was swimming through syrup and he was sticky from the sweat pouring out of his body in response to the pain radiating from the ginger and chili combination.

When Dejun removed the ginger and began to tenderly rub cold milk on him, Kun began to sob, relishing in finally being released from the prison of heat. 

“You were so good” he whispered “Thank you for baring my pain, Mama”. He took his seat promptly and as Kunhang stood to take his place, Yangyang leapt to his feet. 

“Ten! I cant hold it anymore! I need to go next or otherwise I might just die!”

Ten stared disapprovingly at him for a moment, though when his stare shifted to fall on Kunhang who seemed to have withdrawn into himself, he smirked. “OK then. Kunhang will give his confession tomorrow then.”

Yangyang bounded forwards and knelt. “Wait!” Kun gasped and immediately all of their eyes clapped onto him “Please, I need to use the bathroom…” “No, you need to endure the rest of the confession and then you can use the bathroom”

“I can’t…” he whimpered “I’m not going to be able to hold it, please I need to go, please. I don’t care what I have to put up with afterwards, please I just need the bathroom…”

Ten smirked. “Yangyang, go ahead and start your confession”

“My name is Liu Yangyang, and this is my confession to you. I’ve done so many things, I’m not even sure I could confess to them all, but here we go! Firstly, I had sex with you five times while you were at my house and it was the best thing I ever chose to do. I slipped drugs into your coffee and had sex with you in so many positions that you wouldn’t even catch your breath. I fucked your thighs as well, which I know you were awake for. And it was me that sent you those clothes in the box, so you can imagine how angry I was when you threw them away.” He paused for a moment and glanced at Ten who nodded encouragingly “I made three girls in my class carry my babies, and I had every intention of carrying on until I saw you for the first time when Renjun pointed you out. You’ve made me fall in love with you like everyone else, and given half a chance, I would keep you for myself."

“Well. Thank you Yangyang.” Ten announced as he stood “Your punishment for being unable to keep your hands to yourself is to face touch in every direction until tomorrow morning. In every hole. And because our dear Mama is unable to stay in the role of a puppy, he’ll have a urethral plug put in as well, and if he pees himself then he’ll face extra punishment. Now, I think we should get him set up on the bed and call it a day. Afterall, I’m sure we’re all dying to hear tomorrows confessions, and I’m sure we’ll need to rest up for it. Especially Mama.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I write a chapter instead of revising for my chem test? Yes, yes I did. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy the chapter!


	16. Stage Three: Confession (Part Three)

When they came to him in the morning, Kun was soaked in sweat, and cum which had crept out of him around the plug. The sheet underneath him was soaked through, the plug having done nothing when his aching bladder finally failed. He twitched when he felt the hands on his body though he found himself leaning into them, desperate for the touch of anything human and made of flesh instead of silicon and he was almost happy when he earned the sweet murmurings and praises from the boys for having made it through the night, it seemed that his pain and aching body had been worth it after all. 

He felt renewed when they took him back to the room and cuffed him ready for the last confessions. Kunhang stood up and began to move forward taking his position in front of Kun. He could barely look at Kun until Ten cleared his throat and indicated for him to make eye contact and begin his confession. “My name is Wong Kunhang, and this is my confession to you. I have helped others to kill themselves, or go back to a life of drugs and prostitution. I have betrayed my family, and I have betrayed you. I raped you, and I pray every day for forgiveness for that, perhaps this will be my forgiveness…” He stopped abruptly and looked up at Ten who stared back with cold eyes. 

They quickly exchanged words before Ten stood as the jury again “The weight of your crime, since you don’t seem to be able to do things with the permission of others is to fulfil a sexual act on the person who you’ve hurt the most.” He turned to Kun and his expression softened minutely “For this we’ve decided that you’ll perform a blowjob on Kunhang, so that he’s finally done something with consent and with this both of your indiscretions in that instance will be forgotten. Now if you’ll go ahead, we can finish our final confessions.”

Kunhang was white in the face as looked sick as Lucas unshackled Kun and allowed him the freedom to move his hands while he was fulfilling the punishment. The faster he got it done, he figured, the sooner it would be finished and he would never have to think about that night again. So he began by pulling Kunhang out of his underwear and immediately sank his mouth down as far as it would go, before rising again and increasing his suction so that Kunhang felt the delicious drag of skin against skin with every movement of his head. “It feels good doesn’t it Kunhang?” came Dejun’s voice ansd Kunhang could only groan, his previous reservations seemingly gone as he wrapped his finger’s into Kun’s hair and guided his head.

Could it be this easy? Kun wondered as he relaxed and let Kunhang use his like he was nothing more than a piece of meat. Could he really forgive Kunhang for what he did in such a way?

He would never have to think about it again if he went along with it, but, he would never fully know that Kunhang had felt his pain. How was it fair that Kunhang got nothing but pleasure from his actions and yet he’d had to suffer so greatly? For what?

There was no reason. There was no reason at all, he decided, Kunhang needed to feel the pain that he inflicted. Kun clamped his teeth down around him with as much force as he possibly could and relished in the pained scream that Kunhang released. Ten slapped him for it of course, but the kicks and blows he received only made it sweeter as the others helped Kunhang out of the room and returned with looks of genuine surprise. 

“You have to be punished” Ten spat and Kun only nodded, feeling euphoric despite the threat hanging over his head. “You will deliver your confession first, and then I will punish you for doing what you did”

Kun was uncuffed from the post and turned to face them, feeling six pairs of eyes on him as Sicheng brought Renjun in and sat him on his lap. “Let’s begin then” Ten ordered coolly “Who were you, and what have you done. Confess and your soul will be released” and Kun could only breathe deeply for a moment as he looked at Renjun and took in the cast that decorated the boy’s leg, decorated with flowers and the names of his brothers. Kun felt sick looking at him.

“My name… my name was Qian Kun, and this is my confession. I got money in exchange for sex and used the money for drugs, I was raped, I hurt other people and I even got a little boy hurt from my own selfishness.” He began to sob as he took in the look on Renjun’s face. His lip wobbled as he looked between his leg and Kun and Kun felt as if his heart had been ripped out and thrown onto the floor “I’ve been blind, so, so blind” He sobbed as he curled into a ball and hid his face from the weight of their gazes until a pair of soft hands lifted his face and he looked up into the light, seeing only the bright smile on Ten’s face. 

“We’re so proud of you” He whispered, and when Kun saw his eyes brim with tears he smiled too “Can you tell me who you are?”

“I’m Mama.” He whispered

Ten leaned down and pressed a kiss to his forehead “You’re free of pain, and of judgement. Welcome to the family Mama…”

\- 

When they washed the grime off him later that night, he felt euphoric. He had earned the smell of rose petals emitting from the warm instead of the scolding hot water, and the feeling of their hands lathering him instead of the harsh jets of the shower, and if this was his reward then he could be Mama. He could be what they wanted him to be until the time came when he had to leave them. He turned to Ten and Dejun who washed him gently and tried to form his mouth into a happy smile. 

“You shouldn’t stretch your mouth too much, it might hurt you” Ten said as he ran his hands through Kun’s hair gently “I’m proud of you though, for not screaming when Johnny did the procedure without anaesthetic. So I’m thinking that you can have your jaw unwired in about six weeks, as a reward for being so good about it. Six weeks will fly by, and just think you’ll be able to lose a little weight too, which might be a good thing while you still can.” Ten commented and Kun preened, desperately try to stretch his mouth to smile, earning soft kisses to his cheeks and an affectionate look from the two of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I hope you've enjoyed reading the chapter I hope it sort of drew together this step, though I wanted to elaborate on Kun's punishment for biting though the thought of having to watch someone having their jaw wired shut to actually write about having it done without anaesthetic made me too sick to write it in detail.
> 
> I cant stress how excited I am to write the next chapter, so I'll be posting it during the day tomorrow after I've prepped for my presentation. Make sure to leave your comments because I'm really interested in what you have to say about this chapter or what you expect in the next chapter!


	17. Stage Four: Conception

“I’m Mama” He whispered as he looked at his reflection in the mirror, “I’m Mama.” In accepting that one little fact Kun found that his life seemed to be easier, more easy to swallow when he could just accept that being Mama was condemning himself to a life in his new living conditions. But anyone could adapt to new living conditions given the right time to do so, and so Kun began to adapt, finding pleasure in the same routines day in and day out: Get up, make breakfast, clean, make lunch, clean, make dinner, spend time with the boys and go to bed. 

There was very little variation when he learned to do everything correctly, when his insolence and stupidity stopped he found that the beatings and punishments stopped as well. If he was to get punished, he figured, then it would be no one else’s fault but his own as his actions always had consequences. 

There was strange pleasure in the silence in the house in the hours where he was trusted to be alone, out of the range of anything that he could hurt himself with and tucked away in pockets of space without phones or computers. He never forced to speak, only responding with smiles or kisses or holding them in his lap, as after all, all problems could be fixed with kisses and all questions could be answered so simply. There was pleasure in the mundanities too. He found himself finding happiness in the lilting tone of Renjun’s voice as he read to him, or in the sound of Kunhang’s laugh, or the feeling of their hands on him as they whispered praises into every available inch of skin.

He could learn to live happily, he could learn to be satisfied and want nothing more than the life that they’d allowed him to live…

No, no he couldn’t.

“…The search continues for twenty three year old Qian Kun who disappeared almost four months ago under suspicious circumstances. Anyone with information that might pertain to the whereabouts of Mr Qian since his disappearance should contact the police as the family are offering money for the safe return of their son…”

He stopped and set his rag down for a moment to stare at the TV which displayed a picture of his smiling face before cutting to a press conference of his parents, who were pale and looked distraught, as they begged for information about his whereabouts and talked about how much they missed him. He stared in disbelief. 

“So someone was looking for me…” He whispered to himself, remembering all of the times that he’d snuck glances at Ten’s newspapers or articles on Xiaojun’s laptop and not even seen his name mentioned in the missing section. Though his proclamation seemed to attract the attention of Lucas who was sat watching the TV as his head turned and Kun found himself squirming under his usually intense stare. 

“What was that, Mama?” Lucas asked

“Nothing.” Kun laughed in return “Just wondering if one of your brothers has gone to look for look for ingredients for dinner like I asked them to.”

\- 

“Maybe he was just considering about the ingredients for dinner, you know how much he loves cooking for us after all!”

“Don’t be stupid Kunhang, he was talking about the fact that he found out that his parents and club patrons have been looking for him since he disappeared. I’m worried that all of our work is going to be undone and hes going to get wilful and defiant again.”

“Or worse that he might try to run…”

“What should we do about it then?” Their glances all turned to Ten who appeared to be deep in thought for a moment before he raised his eyes and leaned forwards, placing his elbows on the table. 

“If he’s decided that he wants to leave then I suggest that we give him a reason to stay, I think its time for the next step to commence.”

\- 

Kun slipped on his night dress and moved the get into bed, making sure to adjust his chain that it wasn’t caught on anything and wouldn’t tug on his leg as he slept. Though a gentle knock on the door drew his attention and he looked up to find Ten and the other boys stood in the doorway looking at him. “What’s wrong boys?” He asked “Do you want me to read to you or something again because I was just about to go to bed, but I don’t mind of course, if that’s what you want.”

“No Mama” Ten said “We want to go through the next step with you know if you’re OK with doing that.”

Kun swallowed, trying to dislodge the sick feeling that rose in his stomach. “Yes, of course” he whispered and they all entered his room, finding a seat and staring at him with the adoring looks which had become all too familiar to him. Sicheng was missing, he noted. And Yuta, and Renjun. The next step must involve sex then, as those were the only instances where Sicheng and Yuta were not present. 

“It’s nothing bad, I promise. We just want to make love to you a little, and have you truly enjoy it for once.” 

Kun’s expression softened and he sat up to loosen his buttons and expose his body to the boys, it wasn’t uncommon for them to want to see him naked but something about that instance felt heavier as if the weight of expectation was hanging in the room. But still, he held his arms out and accepted them one by one on top of him, allowing them to do what they pleased to his body, while his mind was a thousand miles away and only moaned when he felt it was appropriate to. Ten pressed him open against the sheets and whispered promises hotly against his ears, Lucas was rough with him and shoved in as far as he could, Dejun was possessive and gripped him tightly as he sucked bruises into his flesh, Kunhang was hesitant and cold barely bring himself to touch Kun’s body without his fingers shaking, and Yangyang was arguably the most enthusiastic.

They stayed with him afterwards with their heads laid on his stomach as he drifted off to sleep.

\- 

He’d felt fine after that instance and had carried on as usual, being sick and acting like it never happened. The one day he noticed it, that his stomach was rounding slightly and he was becoming chubbier, it must be because of the cravings he thought, but the way that the swell continued to grow for two months eventually had him approaching Ten. “I think I might be seriously sick.” He whispered as Ten sat him on his lap.

“What makes you think that?”

“My stomach is swelling, I eat a lot because I feel constantly hungry but then I’m always being sick. I think I might have something seriously wrong with my stomach.”

Ten just laughed at him slightly and pressed a kiss to his forehead and a box into is hand. Kun looked at the box and raised an eyebrow in confusion “Go on” Ten prompted before unhooking him and taking him through to the bathroom where they waited in silence.

Kun had to withhold the tears that sprang to his eyes as he read the result: PREGNANT.

“What” He whispered as he stared at the test in disbelief. He quickly ripped another test out of the box and peed on the stick, waiting for another three minutes only to receive the same result.

PREGNANT.

“I don’t… I don’t understand…” He whispered leaning against the side of the bath as his head began to swim.

Kun collapsed onto the floor as he sobbed, Ten tried to touch him but he jerked himself out of his grip violently and moved to curl into the corner. 

“Don’t you understand? What do you have to cry about when you’re really going to be a Mama?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> I hope you’ve enjoyed this chapter, because I’ve enjoyed writing it and setting up it for like, however any chapters. Let me know what you think about the revelation in the comments!


	18. Stage Five: Metamorphosis

The other boys were only more thrilled when they heard of his conception and as soon as they came home, he found himself swarmed by them touching the slight chub of his stomach and squabbling amongst themselves about who’s baby was growing inside of him. It seemed insane that they would have done that to him, implanting things into his body without his knowledge to ensure that he could become their true ideal of what a mother should be.

Their ideals only became more clear as days passed and he became progressively more swollen. They stopped him from cooking, instead sharing the duty between them and ensuring that he ate his own special meals: oatmeal with papayas every morning, salads of varied greens and chickpeas or nuts for lunch, and salmon almost every night. He wasn’t allowed to clean either - instead finding himself forced into a rocking chair in a room upstairs with a bag of yarn and knitting needles, and a record player just within his reach. 

Naturally he became bored easily, finding that no matter how much he tried he had no particular skill in knitting and everything that he tried to make came out misshapen. The boys seemed upset by it as well, and despite his best attempts to pick up the skill, they seemed to become more and more upset when they took in the sight of tangled yarn that he’d tried to make into a blanket. Eventually, they sent Sicheng in to sit with him and demonstrate how he could make little squares of intricate patterns and form a blanket, though when Sicheng pulled a previously crafted blanket out of the cupboard Kun found himself drinking in the sight of stacks of neatly folded blankets. All crocheted by different inexperienced hands, all in varied shades of blue, some with cars some without. There were racks of clothes too – little rows of boots, jumpers, hats all waiting for a phantom baby to wear them. 

“Did you make those?” He queried, and immediately Sicheng slammed the door shut and leaned against it for a moment as if it were a lifeline, or some important relic. 

“Some of them” He muttered as he turned to Kun and showed the delicate stitching of the blanket, showing, to Kun’s surprise, a family of creatures with different faces and hair walking through a forest with a littler creature. “I made this one for the most important child that has ever come out of this room” He explained as he ran his fingers over the face of the small creature in a tender motion. 

“Sicheng” Came a voice from the doorway, and they both turned to find Yuta stood in the doorway looking at the blanket with an odd intensity before tearing his eyes away “They said that we should go to our room, they want to spend some time with him and the baby.”

Sicheng’s expression softened slightly as his grip tightened. “But –“

“No.” Yuta said as he peeled the blanket away and put it back into the cupboard “Come on, he’s fine now and you’ve indulged yourself here too much.” Sicheng followed him without complaint and his comforting presence was replaced immediately when Xiaojun unhooked him from the chair and moved him into the bedroom. It made sense that the “company” that they wanted from him and the baby was sex, after all there was no other reason that they came to him, other than sex. 

It was easy enough to zone out the feeling of their hands on his chest, on his stomach. Their voices droned into one another, forming a buzz like that of fly that was easy enough to ignore as his mind turned to the delicacy of making blankets. He would put space on it he thought, full of stars and shiny things that would make his baby forget that the world inside its home was not a beautiful place. 

“Mama” Came Ten’s voice “Its time for you to start the next step.”

Kun looked down at him and the others who were bright with enthusiasm that he hadn’t seen since the moment he arrived in their home. “You’ve acknowledged that you’re Mama, and you’re becoming a Mama very soon, but you’re not appearing like a Mama. We’ve let you do what you want since you got here, but its time to settle down and have a family for real.”

“What’s the next step?” He asked wearily.

“You just need to accept the role of being Mama properly, you have the things in the room to become a real Mama. You have the clothing, the jewellery and everything else too and every Mama has to go through metamorphosis into a beautiful butterfly.”

“No.”

“What was that?” Ten asked, as if daring him to speak again.

“No” He repeated, feeling slightly bolder “I wont do it, you’ve taken everything from me. My name, my body, everything. I’m not going to let you take this from me as well.”

Ten stared at him, and when he spared a glance at the other boys their faces seemed frozen as they stared at him. Then the sound of Ten’s blow rang out across the room and they all stared blankly except Kunhang who seemed to have to force himself to not recoil from the sound of the blow. 

He was grabbed by his hair and was dragged, thrashing and screaming to one of the other bedrooms on the floor. Ten paused, planting a foot firmly on Kun’s chest and pressing to prevent him from getting up as he pulled out what seemed to be a large box from under the bed. He threw Kun into it and glared down at him for a minute before slamming the lid down. From inside Kun could hear the sound of the lock clicking back into place. “If I hear a peep from you, you’ll stay there until that baby comes out of you.” He hissed as he slid the box back under the bed before his footsteps retreated. 

\- 

Being inside the box was torture, Kun decided. No light penetrated the thick walls of the box from any side. Nor did sound from the person sleeping in the bed above him. The only small mercies where when a small hole was opened at the top of the box, once every few days to feed him a few bites of food and a sip of water or two, he begged and pleaded to be let out from the box becoming more and more manic with every passing day as the echoing darkness and the confinement of the box began to torment. 

He felt hot and itchy without their touch, abandoned without care and when he could not longer tell how long he had been in there he lay flat and stared at the ceiling of his box, keeping quiet entirely quiet and breathing the stale air shallowly. After about four months, he felt the box move and stared into the face of Ten blankly. “Well, you didn’t die” Ten grinned “I’m surprised that you survived two weeks in the box without going batshit and screaming like the others did”

“Two…weeks?” He croaked

“Yep, only two weeks!” Ten smirked “I hope that you learned your lesson” 

Kun nodded silently as allowed himself to be escorted into the bathroom and washed down. He stayed silent when he was taken back to his room, and accepted their kisses willingly as they came. 

\- 

The next morning he settled down at the vanity with his new dress on, the cherry printed fabric hanging slightly awkwardly over his distended stomach. He brushed on the makeup and slipped on the shoes that were made to match before sitting down and staring at himself. If they wanted a Mama, why not go the full ten yards? 

Kunhang did a double take when he saw him but didn’t comment as the undid the chain and slipped the anklet from his leg. Kun watched him do so and Kunhang explained “Ten said that you wouldn’t need it now.”

Kun calmly walked down the stairs to greet them for breakfast and the looks that he got made his stomach flutter slightly. If being good got their adoration then he could get used to doing what he was told

. 

“Húdié, you look beautiful…” Ten whispered as he captured Kun’s chin between his thumb and finger, and Kun blushed under his attention. “You’re absolutely perfect, you always have been. Did you have everything you wanted?”

Kun lowered his gaze when Ten released his face. “Yes daddy.” Ten seemed to do a double take at the change that seemed to have happened “Though, if you like the idea, I thought I might change my hair a little bit because it doesn’t really suit who I am now…”

“Anything for you Húdié, how could I ever say no to you?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I've been gone for like, a hot minute because all of my school work has been due this week, but I hope the chapter makes up for it a little bit.
> 
> I love this chapter because its just full of irony, symbolism and the seedlings of the next twist in this story, if you spot any of these then please, feel free to let me know because then I don't feel like writing them in was for nothing! I have another fanfiction on my profile that's going to quite similar in tone to this, if you would like to check that out please do. 
> 
> I'm hoping that now that the bulk of my school work is finished with I might have a little more time to write so keep your eyes peeled for more chapters and let me know what you think of them!


	19. Stage Six: Shortcomings

True to his word, Ten allowed him to get his hair cut, though Kun had expected that he would be sat on the stool in the kitchen and Yuta would cut his hair like he had done with all of the other boys when they needed their hair cuts. He had gone to sit on the stool before Ten had caught him and pulled him back. “You’re much too refined for a stool, I’ll take you to a salon.” He grinned as he lead Kun out of the front door and into a car that was waiting in the drive, sitting him in the passenger’s seat before setting off. 

He was entranced by the sight out of the window, and unrolled the window to lean out slightly and feel the cool breeze against his face as they drove slowly through the streets to a nearby salon. He sat in anticipation for Ten’s customary warning about the consequences of him being disobedient but Ten only got out of the car and walked around to the other side, opening the door and holding out his hand to help him out.

Inside of the salon, Ten exchanged a few words with the woman behind the desk who smiled and blushed before escorting Kun over to one of the free chairs. Ten sat on the other side of the room, chatting with some of the other men who were waiting for the other women in the salon. He could make a run for it, he thought briefly before shaking his head and turning his face back towards the mirror, not really seeing himself but someone else staring back at him. 

“Mrs Lee?” A timid voice askes and Kun broke out of his daze to see a young looking woman stood behind him “Hello, my name is Yuri and I’ll be your stylist for today. Your husband mentioned that you would like to completely change your look, can you elaborate a little bit so I can get your look down?”

Kun nodded and quickly explained his vision, earning a little nod from Yuri who swiftly moved him into a different chair and set about styling his hair. Almost three hours later, Kun was finished and he turned to Ten who stared at him for a moment before springing up out of his seat and cupping his face gently.

“You look beautiful Húdié” He whispered as he ran his fingers through Kun’s long blonde locks “I’m sure that the others are going to love it as well”

\- 

“We’re going on a little detour before we head home” Ten told him as they headed a little further in the direction that they went to the salon, before pulling up to a big house in the suburbs. Ten wrapped a little scarf from the backseat around his eyes as they approached the house and knocked. 

“Ten.” Came the curt voice that Kun recognised immediately as Johnny “What can I do for you?”

“I want you to tell me the gender of the baby, if you can of course.”

“Johnny?” Came a soft call from inside the house “Who is it?” 

“No one baby, just Ten being annoying as usual”

“I see he’s doing well, wouldn’t it be a shame if all of a sudden he were to leave you?” Ten commented and the aura surrounding them seemed to change as Ten began to move him through the house and down some stairs, depositing him soundly on a little bed as Johnny set up what seemed to be the ultrasound. Johnny was silent as he rubbed the gel into his stomach and began to roll the wand around. 

“Well… it looks like the baby is female” Johnny muttered and Kun felt his breath hitch as he took in the grainy shape of the baby on the little screen.

“Are you sure?” Ten asked

“I’m pretty sure there’s no penis or testicles so I’m fairly certain it’s a girl” Kun turned his head and looked up at Ten, tensing slightly when he saw the story expression brewing on his face. 

“Daddy?” He asked

“Johnny. Abort it.” He hissed

“Ten-“

“Abort. It. Now” Ten hissed.

“I’m not going to abort it Ten, you know I can’t perform safe abortions and you’ve already seen that I’m not really great at guessing gender, so there’s every chance that I’m wrong”

Ten seized him by the wrist and dragged him from the bed, taking him outside and all but shoving him into the backseat. Kun cried most of the way home, and he could do little more than sob as Ten took him back inside the house and began to tell the others that the baby was female, earning even more disappointed glances and mutters from the boys as they turned from him.

They didn’t speak to him after that incidence, not even sparing him a glance in passing or a word as the baby swelled and grew inside of him.

\- 

He spent his time knitting peacefully, alone in the nursery that would have belonged to his beautiful Meixing when she was born. He paused as he placed the last stitches into the blanket and listened to the sound of the family laughing and chatting downstairs, he stood padding closer to the open door and listening over the railing to the voices below him.

“…I saw someone who I think would be perfect the other day in the restaurant down the street…”

“What were they like?”

“Very beautiful, kind, very friendly and helpful and he even helped out Renjun so its probable that he likes children too…”

“Keep your eye on him then, if he proves himself then when this Mama has given birth and passed on then we’ll begin courting the next Mama to take his place…”

Kun reeled back and slumped against the railing, desperately trying to hold back his sobs as the conversation continued below him.

“He’s named her y’know”

“We should have told him not to.”

“You made it very clear what to do if there was news of the conception of a girl, we’ve just been following what you said…”

He couldn’t bear to hear any more of their words and turned, stumbling back into the bedroom and shutting the door carefully after himself. He gathered his things quickly and moved the rocking chair under the chandelier that hung from the ceiling. The blanket adorned with the stars and planets that he had spent hours crocheting was wrapped, twisted and pulled tight around the chandelier and without a trace of doubt in his mind, Kun stood and placed the other end around his neck, stepping off the chair and feeling the blanket tighten around his neck. 

He flailed slightly, feeling it become impossibly tighter and -


	20. Stage Seven: Understanding

Sicheng opened the door of the nursery. “Hey Mama” he called before stopping dead in his tracks as he saw the slightly swaying figure in front of him. He was stunned, just staring at the body as it swayed from side to side slightly like a leaf in some invisible wind.

“Ma…ma?” He whispered taking in the sight slowly, and then it hit him all at once. “SHIT, CAN SOMEONE COME AND HELP ME?!” He shouted over the rail and was met with the sound of feet pounding up the stairs as he stood on the rocking chair and yanked the blanket from the light fixture. Kun’s body slumped to the ground and Sicheng cringed slightly as he took in the sight of his motionless and pale form. Kunhang skidded into the bedroom and clamped a hand over his mouth as he heaved at the sight of Kun’s body. 

“Stop it. Come and help me, I’ll do the compressions and you breathe into his mouth when I tell you to.” Sicheng ordered as he rolled Kun over and began compressions, stopping every once in a while to order Kunhang to breathe into his mouth. They continued for a few minutes, the others having gathered in the room to watch the whole ordeal, and when Yuta came to pull Sicheng away he turned and struck him hard in the chest, knocking him back before he continued. 

He breathed a sigh of relief when Kun’s body eventually seized slightly and arched as his lungs sucked in another breath of air. “Someone go and call Johnny” Yangyang nodded gravely and headed down the stairs while the others helped Sicheng in the process of moving Kun back into the bedroom. Sicheng sat at his side watching the slow rise and fall of is chest as they waited for Johnny, who arrived promptly when he heard the cause of his summoning. He placed a breathing mask on Kun to aid with his breathing and when he had checked that his vitals were becoming more steady, he set up the ultrasound and began to roll the wand around.

“From what I can see” He said “The baby appears to be perfectly fine. It’s heartbeat is a little bit elevated but other than that I believe it should be alive and back to perfect health within the next few weeks.” 

He turned and fixed Sicheng with a firm stare “If it hadn’t been for Sicheng resuscitating him when he did theres no doubt that in a few more minutes, both Kun and the baby would have been dead.” 

The others seemed to exchange looks between themselves as Johnny packed up and left,, though before they could say anything to Sicheng, he beat them to it. “Get. Out.” He hissed “I don’t want you here when he wakes up, and I need to explain everything to him so that we can move forwards from here” and without another word they filed out of the door with the exception of Ten who stayed and lingered in the corner, opening his mouth to speak.

“You too.” Sicheng hissed “You’re the worst for doing this to him, and if you want him stay like I know you wants before, then he deserves an explanation.”

Ten too left them alone in the bedroom.

\- 

Kun woke up after about two hours, and Sicheng noticed that as soon as he sat up and realised that his plan had ultimately failed he fell back onto the pillows and covered his face, beginning to sob silently.

“Hey” Sicheng said quietly, and Kun looked at him from behind his hands “I know that you’re upset that you didn’t die, but I think we need to talk a little. This step would normally come a little later, but I think its more appropriate given everything that’s gone on.”

Kun nodded silently and Sicheng began to speak. “I know why you tried to kill yourself, it’s because you overheard them talking about replacing you and I know it hurts to hear them because I’ve been in the same position as you. I’ll get onto that in a little while but I think you need to actually know why you’re here”

He paused and looked at Kun who stared with a face so neutral that Sicheng thought that he wasn’t listening or a moment, though the little nod indicated for him to continue speaking. “So, I think the best place to start is with Ten. When he was younger, his mother was a little… promiscuous, she never cared about him and eventually when she left and didn’t come back for almost two weeks he was noticed by a teacher at his school and was taken away by social services where he was put into a foster home with a bunch of other kids. He meet Dejun and Kunhang when he was in that home, and because Ten was older than them they looked to him for guidance and advice so he became like their surrogate big brother. At the same time, a girl about the same age as Ten was brought into the foster home and she became very close with the three of them because she took good care of them. She defended them when the other kids were mean, and looked after their stuff and even read Kunhang and Dejun stories when it was time for them to go to bed, so she became the equivalent of the mother to all of them”

He paused, staring into his lap for a moment as if considering his words.

“One day she had said that a boy had asked her to wait for him because he wanted to confess to her so she sent them off home from school. But when she came home, they knew something was wrong and later that night she hung herself in the bedroom because as it turned out, that boy and five of his friends had raped her. After that they never recovered and when Ten was seventeen he was told that his mother had been murdered and he’d come into possession of his old house, which is this house, so as soon as he was eighteen he took off and moved into the house, using the money he had inherited to survive, and one by one the others moved in as well, bringing Lucas and Yangyang with them. It was clear from the get go that they didn’t know what to do with themselves and they just wanted to have someone who would guide them and look after them and so Ten came up with the concept of a Mama.”

Kun shivered slightly at his words but nodded to show he was still listening.

“Their idea of a Mama was someone who would take care of them in every sense and when Ten fell in love for the first time, with a woman much older than himself, it seemed as if their idea of a Mama was finally manifesting as a person and when she cheated on him, Ten was so angry that he killed her which is what started the cycle. They would go out and fall in love with the idea of someone that they had met, and then they began to court them in hopes that a more sincere connection would convince them to stay then when they began to report them to the police or even run away it was decided that they would bring them home and raise them like an orchid in an environment of love and appreciation which would help them to get used to taking on the role of this perceived person. That I know about, there have been almost thirty Mama’s and most of them were failures because they died from drug overdoses when Ten was trying to wean them off heroine and cocaine or during the confession stages, some even just killed themselves. Then the first success came in the form of a woman named Jieun who fell in love with Kunhang, and took everything else as a side effect of loving Kunhang then when she became pregnant the knowledge that the baby that she was having might not be Kunhang’s drove her to ask him for help in killing herself, and he complied giving her the pills to kill herself with little pain.” 

He stopped again and reached over to the side of the bed, pulling out a picture of Kunhang and a beautiful young woman together, looking happier than ever.

“Ten was furious with him and he beat Kunhang so badly that the others thought that he might have killed him because Ten hit him with a hammer as well which seemed to work in getting Kunhang to submit, soon after that all of the boys learned to submit and even became more involved in the search for the ultimate symbol of love which was their Mama. They didn’t have any more success for a few years until…” He stopped and breathed deeply for a moment before looking Kun in the eyes “Until me. I didn’t care that they were damaged, or hurt, and after I started doing what they told me to I learned to love them despite the fact that there was something wrong with them all. I made a mistake, when I was allowed to go out they took me to a small gathering with some of their friends and I met Yuta for the first time, so when they weren’t watching we slipped away from the crowd and became intimate which I thought would be without any consequence until I got pregnant and they tested my baby’s DNA so that I could marry its father because every baby should have two parents, and when they found out that they baby was Yuta’s and was going to be a girl, they planned to replace me immediately and just kill me. As it turned out, the baby was a boy.”

“We named the baby Renjun” Came Yuta’s voice from the door as he moved and sat next to Sicheng on the bed and placed a tender hand on his thigh. “He was so beautiful when he was born and we were so happy to have a little boy to call our own, but then Ten told us that if we didn’t get married immediately then Renjun would be considered as a bastard and they would have to put him into an orphanage, and if we protested then they’d kill Sicheng and Renjun too, so that afternoon we got married and that same afternoon Ten told us that Sicheng couldn’t be the Mama they were looking for because their Mama wasn’t a whore and an infidel then he kicked Sicheng out of the house and told him that if he interfered with Renjun in any capacity then there would be severe consequences.”

“It’s my fault you ended up here” Sicheng whispered “I mentioned you when we moved away and I me you for the first time, and I didn’t know that they would take that as me suggesting you to fill the position but then when Yangyang, Dejun and Kunhang saw you in the supermarket they were enamoured and decided that if they all felt the same love for you then it must be a sign that you were fated to be with them…”

They lapsed into silence for a moment before Kun spoke up, his voice croaky and thick “What’s going to happen to me now?”

“Well, you’ll carry that baby until you give birth then if it’s a girl they’ll kill you and the baby because they perceive that the perfect Mama would only ever give birth to boys. If you have a boy then they’ll test his DNA and you’ll marry whoever fathered the baby to make sure that the family is completed. Then you’ll stay with them until you have any girls, at which point they’ll replace you but you wont be killed. You’ll live a life of polygamy even when you’re married, but it wont be unpleasant.”

Kun nodded slightly and stared up at the ceiling, finally understanding his purpose since the first time that he had started living with them

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wooooooooh this chapter was so long, though I hope you understand whats going on a little more now. As usual, leave your thoughts in the comments and let me know what you think!
> 
> By the way, I have thoughts that could end up being two potential stories revolving around this one. One would be explaining a little more about Johnny and his history that will be coming up briefly soon, and the other would be a sequel to this fic, which I have a lot of ideas for! Let me know if you’d be interested in seeing either of these because I don’t want to write something that no one would be interested in reading.


	21. Stage Eight: Rebirth

Kun continued living within the silent walls of the house for four months after his suicide attempt, making sure to stay out of the way at each given opportunity because if he was a failure then there needn’t be a reason for the boys to miss him when he died. He cooked his dinner silently when they had all gone to bed or before they got up in the mornings, returning to his diet of oatmeal and salad and salmon, and during the day he remained in the nursery repairing the blanket or knitting little outfits at Sicheng’s insistence that the outfits would just be used by other babies if he had a girl. Every once in a while, some shadowy figure would slip through the silent halls of the house and would watch him from the crack in the door, or would crawl into bed with him as night feeling the gentle pulse of the baby’s kicks. 

It was a silent acknowledgement between them, the confession of a father and the acceptance of the mother that the life growing between them was theirs. “I love you…You know that right?” Came the voice one night in the early twilight hours of the morning. 

“I know you do.” Kun whispered back, barely audible but knowing that he was heard and below their conjoined hands the baby delivered its own proclamation of love with a little kick.

He was gone the next morning when the pain tore through Kun’s stomach and he instinctively screamed, summoning Sicheng who took note of the wetness between his legs and smiled. “Congratulations, you’re about to become a Mama because you’re in labour!” He grinned “I’ll get Yuta to call Johnny and we’ll get things moving here.”

True to his word, Johnny was summoned to their house with instructions to hurry and while they waited Sicheng sat at his side and helped him to breathe when contractions wracked his body, and putting cold towels on his forehead when he began to sweat violently from the pain coursing through his body. It took half an hour for Johnny to arrive, two bags in tow as opposed to his regular backpack and his face hardened with resolve. He gathered the equipment from the bag and slipped on a pair of gloves before turning to Kun.

“Well, you made it! That’s great, a lot of others haven’t even gotten this far!” 

Kun stared at him for a moment and gritted his teeth “Johnny, I feel like I’m dying. Get this damn thing out of me.”

“Wow you’re touchy” Johnny tutted as he slipped his fingers inside of him. “I think…you’re about five centimetres dilated, so you might be waiting for a little while longer before the baby comes. I can give you something for the pain if you want it?”

“No” Came a voice from the doorway and the three of them turned finding Ten “He’s still a Mama until the baby comes out of him. You know the rules about this kind of stuff.”

“Of course” Johnny replied curtly before turning back to Kun “I can’t give you any pain medication then, but do let me know if there’s anything I can do to make you more comfortable. I’ll check again in about an hour or so” He stood and left the room as another contraction ripped through Kun’s body.

“Sicheng…” he whimpered “Why cant they just let me have a c-section of something?”

Sicheng ran a hand through Kun’s wet hair to comfort him “They don’t want your body ruined, so a c-section is off the table there unless its super necessary to do so”

Kun began to sob at his words and Sicheng could do little more than just try to shush him and wipe his tears away. He cringed ad Kun began to scream from the pain ripping through his body and eventually just resorted to holding his shaking form in his arms. “Shhh, I know it hurts. It’s the worst pain you’ve every felt, but it’ll all be over soon and the pain will go away and you’ll have a little baby that’s all your own.” He held Kun for the hour, rocking him gently in his arms as if he were the baby and cooing praises, different to those that he had received from the boys, into his hair of how well he was doing, and how his baby would be perfect.

When Johnny checked him after an hour, announcing “6 centimetres” Kun broke down sobbing again, and with every hour after he became more and more hysterical from the never ending burning pain. When the point where Johnny announced he could push came Kun didn’t hold back, bearing down and feeling the solid mass of the baby gradually moving down inside of him. He screamed and held onto Sicheng’s hand in a vice grip as he panted his way through each push until the head became visible at his entrance. “One more push and she’ll be out” Johnny encouraged and with one last look into Sicheng’s hopeful face, Kun found the strength to push forward and pushed for the final time screaming as he felt the pressure in his abdomen release and a shrill wail filled the air. 

The cord was cut and Kun finally slumped back against the pillows, pale and exhausted as the placenta followed. Johnny busied himself checking over the baby and cleaning it, but when he paused and stared at the baby Kun lifted his head and looked at him. 

“Is there something wrong with her?” He asked weakly and Johnny shook his head. “Can I hold her then? I might not get another chance, and I want to hold her as much as I can before they come and take her away”

Johnny simply moved to the doorway with the baby wrapped in a little white blanket. “Ten” He called, and Ten came standing in the doorway with a look of disgust so fierce that Kun had to hold back his sobs. Though when Johnny showed him the baby Ten’s face stilled, then twisted, and broke out into a smile of delight.

“Its… a boy…” He whispered in disbelief “IT’S A BOY!”

Kun bolted upright and stared in confusion “It cant be, you said I was having a girl”

“I was obviously wrong then because this baby has a penis, which means that you’ve just delivered a little boy” 

Kun couldn’t keep his emotions down as they placed the baby into his arms, and as he snuggled closer he began to shake with sobs. He lifted his finger to his son’s cheek and felt his heart skip as he turned and nuzzled closer to the contact. 

“Do you have a name for him?” Johnny asked gently “I know that you had a name picked out for a girl, but do you have any for a boy?”

Kun floundered for a moment as he stared into the face of the squirming baby, but when he opened his eyes a crack he knew. 

“Chenle” He whispered “His name is Chenle. It can mean ‘star of happiness’ and ‘music star’ and I know he’s going to bring so much happiness…” Johnny nodded and approached, swabbing the inside of Chenle’s mouth for a moment before leaving the mother and baby alone in the bedroom. “Hi there Lele, I’m your Mama and I promise that I’m gonna love you and protect you more than any one else in this world” He pressed a little kiss to his forehead “I’ll die before I let anyone hurt you, little star…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uwu we've finally got a little baby Lele!
> 
> We're so close to the end now its like actually surreal, let me know what you think is going to happen in the last few chapters. As well, who do you think Chenle's father is?
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	22. Step Nine: Message

A soft knock rang out through the bedroom, and Kun often his head from looking at Chenle’s face to take in the sight of his visitor. “Good morning Renjun” He greeted “Is it your turn this morning?”

“Yep!” He chirped as he approached and sat down to his side where he could gently stroke Chenle’s head while he fed. Kun could see the tinges of worry on his face and raised his eyebrow slightly. 

“You’re worried baby, whats wrong?”

“I’m not worried Mama!” He huffed indignantly 

“You are worried Renjun I can see it your face, don’t lie to your Mama“

Renjun was silent for a moment before he lowered his head “I haven’t done it before, I don’t wanna hurt you or whatever”

Kun laughed slightly and ran his hand through Renjun’s hair. “Baby, the others have been a lot rougher, and I know that you’d never hurt me on purpose.” He paused looking at Chenle who looked sleepier than before and had detached himself from Kun’s nipple. He lifted Chenle, setting the little blanket that he’d had at his side on his shoulder and rested him against it, beginning to at his back gently until little hiccups and burps came pouring out of him. When Chenle had stopped burping and was sleeping soundly against Kun’s shoulder, he carefully laid him down in the cot next to his bed and spared a moment just staring into the face of his son before he leaned and pressed a tender kiss to his forehead, muttering a little “sleep well, little star” before he resumed his position on the bed and gestured for Renjun to join him.

Renjun slid into his lap and stopped, allowing Kun to move him so that he lay with his head pressed against his stomach but the rest of his body was reclined on the bed. Renjun seemed to hesitate but Kun’s nod of reassurance had him leaning up and capturing one of the engorged nipples into his mouth to begin the daily suckling that occurred twice a day since Chenle was born. He wasn’t even aware that men could lactate until he gave birth to Chenle and woke to a soaked shirt when his nipples began to leak milk ready for his son. Though seemed that no matter how much Chenle drank, his chest became sore and tender, heavy with the unused milk to the point where touches to his chest became agonising and so the boys had created a roster as to who would drink the excess milk each day.

He sighed happily as Renjun began to properly milk him, pulling the nipple slightly with his teeth to entice the milk out of it. He looked up into Kun’s face and detached his mouth, earning a discontented mewl as he stopped suckling. “I’m not hurting right?” He asked 

“No baby, you’re doing perfect.” He returned tenderly, and his arms moved to cradle Renjun.

They stayed in the position for almost fifteen minutes, Renjun drinking his fill of the sweet milk and Kun enjoying the pleasure and bliss that came from it, until they were interrupted by a knock at the door and he looked up with hazy eyes to see Lucas stood there.

“Ten said that he wants to talk to you” Lucas told him and Kun could only nod as he eased Renjun away. 

“We’ll have to carry on in a little bit, your daddy wants to talk to me for a little while” and though Renjun whined he nodded and rolled from Kun’s lap onto the bed as he stood, rearranged his clothes and descended the stairs, finding Ten sat at the table with a very grave expression.

“What’s wrong daddy?” 

Ten seemed to be sweating slightly, his face pale and almost desperate as he took in the sight of Kun in front of him. “As you know, you’ve passed through eight of the ten steps. This means that you’re going to be faced with a big decision soon as to whether you want to leave, and return to your old life or if you’re willing to stay here with us.”

Naturally, he was stunned by disbelief. “…Leave?” He whispered.

“Yes, step ten involves your final choice in which if you leave, you have to leave Chenle behind but you’ll be free, and you’ll never hear from us or see us again. If you stay, then theres something you need to sign but you’ll stay here with us as our Mama until you die.”

Again he was stunned, his mouth was dry as he considered the options but his mind spun with the weight of the choices becoming hazy and strange as the idea of leaving, returning to the family that searched for him relentlessly, was presented to him. “I don’t… know what to do…” He confessed and Ten only nodded at him. 

“That’s why we have step nine, I’m going to take you to meet someone who’s been in a similar position so you can talk privately about it, we’re not going to be there while you speak to him, because we don’t want to influence your choice. Go and get Chenle ready, because you’re gonna be there for a while and your gonna need to feed him again.”

-

The journey to meet the mystery person felt agonisingly long as he sat in the back of the car, babbling and making faces at Chenle. When they pulled up and he was let out of the car he recognised the house immediately, going up to the door and pressing the bell only to be met with the smiling face of Johnny 

“Baby!” Johnny yelled back into the house “Make yourself presentable, your guest is here!”

Johnny let him inside and for the first time Kun took in the house of his doctor. It seemed normal enough, white walls and wooden floors covered in various toys, crayons and bits of paper. There were lunch boxes sat on the counter, and little pairs of shoes in the halls covered in dirt and grass and Kun soon knew why as three toddlers bombed from the living room and skidded on the wooden floors into the kitchen to grab the boxes, and began to pillage them for snacks.

“NEAT!” The first one cheered brandishing a fruit roll up.

The second didn’t look as impressed as he brandished a bag of carrot sticks “Mommy sucks!” He shouted “I don’t want veggies in my lunch!”

The third one bit down on an Oreo he had produced “He told you if you kept playing football indoors then he’d take away your snack, and you didn’t listen” He mumbled, projectiling crumbs out of his mouth. A little cough from Johnny had the three of them turning and flushing at the sight of Kun watching them amusedly. “Who’s that?” Carrot Sticks shouted and Johnny just shook his head as the loud noise startled Chenle and he began to cry.

“Mark! Jeno! Jaemin! Look what you did!” Came a chiding voice from behind them and Kun turned, letting out an audible gasp when he took in the figure standing there. “Hi” they greeted him “Let’s go talk in the lounge, Johnny can you take the boys out for a little while so were not disturbed?”

Johnny nodded and began shoving the three little boys into their coats and shoes before herding them out of the door. The man gestured and Kun moved with him to sit on the sofa.

“You’re the last person I imagined I’d be seeing “ he confessed.

“I know right?” Taeyong laughed “I didn’t imagine that you would be here either, especially when I was told you were having a girl…” He gazed at Chenle and his face split into another grin as he began to coo and stroke his cheeks.

“Anyways, cute baby aside, we’ve got things to discuss. This is sort of my step nine, but yours as well. I understand that you’ve been given your choice?”

“Yeah, they said I could go home if I left Chenle, or I could stay”

“And what are you thinking?”

“I’m… not sure” 

“Why” 

“I don’t want to leave Chenle… but I know living with them is like a nightmare! They don’t clean up after themselves, they can barely function as people without me there to look after them and they need constant love and attention –“ He paused when he saw the intense look on Taeyong’s face. “What?”

“I think you’ve already made your mind up, given the way that you speak about them.” He said softly “There’s no shame you know, in admitting that you want to stay with them”

“I don’t-“

“Kun. Let me tell you this, because I had to make this decision in the past as well. When I had to choose, I sat and though to myself for a while and I considered, did I want to leave the boys? No. Did I want to leave Johnny knowing how he would be without me? No. Did I love them? Yes, yes I did. Could I be happy like this? Yes. And just like that the decision was clear to me, I think these are things you need to consider before you make a choice.”

\- 

He sat at the table that night surrounded by the boys who waited with bated breath to hear his words. 

“I’ve made a decision.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One chapter left!! What decision do you think Kun will make in the last chapter?


	23. Step Ten: Signing

They were at the breakfast table when the officers burst in brandishing guns and forcing them down onto the floor while they escorted Kun away into the car and drove him away while the rest of them were forced into cuffs and were put into the cars waiting outside.

-

“Mr Qian” the nurse said soothingly trying to stop him from flailing about “Mr Qian, please. I just need to check you over and make sure that you’re OK”. She was only met with more desperate flails and animal grunts as Kun struggled to get away from her, she shouted out into the corridor and as more doctors came in, brandishing needles he began to trash about, kicking at the nurses until the prick of the needle entered his arm and he felt his body relax. 

When he fell unconscious the nurses and doctors began to work, replacing his nightdress with a hospital robe and beginning to check him over, taking note of his bruises, the slight deformity in his legs and when the doctor pushed at Kun’s lips he was met with resistance. He pushed again, lifting the edge of his lip and being met with the sight of thread. Red threads. Behind him he could hear the nurse heave as he lifted more of his lip to find the threads stitched inside of his mouth. “Scissors, please” he ordered, pulling hip lip back and beginning to snip the stitches out pulling the threads gently out of the flesh before turning his lips over to inspect the damage. 

“His lips were sewn shut by hand” He commented “Pass that onto the police because they’ll need to ask them about it.” The nurse nodded, going to talk to the police officer that was sat outside of the door. 

The documenting continued, taking in the scars and slashes, taking bloods and taking in the pock marks that lined his arms. When they were finished, his arms were secured into the restrains and he was left alone for the first time in a long time. 

“Mr and Mrs Qian” The doctor addressed and Kun’s parents stood immediately, faces grey with worry. “He’s quite obviously gone through a lot of trauma, but I expect with a bit of therapy and some time to recover he’ll be fine.” 

His parents breathed a sigh of relief and his mother slumped against his father and began to weep. “Can we see him?” His father asked as he cradled his wife. 

“Once he’s woken up from sedation, yes”.

\- 

The folder was slammed onto the table, earning a raised eyebrow from Yangyang. “Do you know what this is, Mr Liu?” The officer asked.

“No. But I’m sure that you’ll enlighten me.”

“Its everything that we have about this case and you, and the others involvement in the disappearance of Qian Kun. Firstly, the documentation of his injuries from the hospital, it mentions that he had cuts across his body which had healed into scars, his bones are deformed from being broken and not healing properly, and that his lips were sewn shut. What do you have to say to that?”

Yangyang was silent, staring coolly at the folder. The officer pressed on “We have CCTV footage showing someone that we believe is you, putting Mr Qian into a car while he looks unconscious. You were his neighbour correct?”

Silence. 

“There were signs of a struggle at Mr Qian’s apartment, as well.”

Silence. 

The officer stopped and looked at Yangyang who sat there with an amused smile on his face. “Is something amusing, Mr Liu?”

Yangyang just began to giggle slightly, before bursting into peals of laughter and eventually calming down enough to speak. “I think you misunderstand what’s happened. Perhaps you should ask Kun about the nature of our relationship. Yes, it was me that carried him out of his apartment that night because he said he wanted to move into the house with me and the others and when we left him to get his stuff, he fell asleep. So I carried him down and Lucas put his stuff in the back of the car. If we were going to kidnap him, why would we take his belongings?”

The officer seemed stumped for a moment, floundering and so Yangyang pressed on. “As well, I have proof that Kun’s ‘injuries’ were inflicted with his consent.” He slipped a thick piece of paper across the table to the officer, who seemed to pale as he took in its contents before standing and leaving the room. Behind the glass, Yangyang began to smile again.

\- 

His mother and father were waiting when he woke up. “Kun” his mother whispered tenderly as she brushed a hand through his hair. He struggled to sit up as his mother shushed him and tried to calm his growing hysteria. “Kun, Kun it’s OK now! They can’t get you here, and they won’t hurt you anymore.”

“I want to go back”

“What?” His mother breathed in disbelief.

“I want to go back!” He struggled, trying to get out of bed and upon realizing that his hands had been restrained to the bed, he began to pull at them as his mother shouted for the doctor. Kun stilled when the doctor came into the room and he took in the sight of the tall man who stood before him. 

“Mr Qian, my name is Doctor Seo. You might remember me from when you were awake earlier.” He smiled as Kun relaxed back onto the bed. “Now, the police would like to ask you a few questions, please answer them truthfully because it may help to convict the men that did this to you.”. A single silent nod was all he got in return and the doctor gestured for the officers in the hall to come in. 

“Mr Qian.” They regarded as they pulled out their notebooks “Thank you for agreeing to speak to us. Could we begin with you talking through the night you were kidnapped?”

“I wasn’t kidnapped. But Yangyang and Lucas took me home that night and I was supposed to grab my stuff ready to move in, but I ended up falling asleep on the sofa instead. So they carried me down to the car with the stuff I collected and drove me home. That’s it.”

“OK. Can you tell us about your relationship with your kidnappers?”

“They’re not kidnappers, because I wasn’t kidnapped.”

“What is your relationship with them like though?”

Kun paused for a moment and seemed to consider his words. “We make love from time to time. They love me and I love them just as much, so I don’t see much of a problem with it.”

“And your relationship with Liu Yangyang in particular?” They questioned, taking in Kun’s expression. 

“He’s my husband, we’ve been married for around three weeks now. We have a child together, named Chenle.” His mother gasped next to him and dissolved into unintelligible sobs about how her baby had been forced to marry someone who had hurt him so violently. “I wasn’t forced to marry him, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

They stopped and stared at him for a long moment before one of the officers, reached into his jacket and pulled out some papers, handing them over to Kun to inspect. “Did you sign these willingly?”

Kun didn’t even need to look at what it was as he flipped the pages and pointed to the lines where “LIU KUN” was visible. He set it down on the bed and looked at the officers with a hard stare “You already seem to know that I signed it, I did consent because my name is on it. Now if you’re satisfied, I would like to leave this room and go home because there’s nothing wrong with me and I have a baby to look after.” He turned to the doctor who lingered in the doorway and gestured to the cuffs “Can I have these off? I would like to check myself out.”

The doctor nodded and quickly unshackled him from his restraints then left to fetch the paperwork, followed by the officers. 

“Kun, why did you say you weren’t kidnapped? Why did you say that you were married? What were those papers?”

Silently, he redressed himself in the long nightdress he’d be brought in not missing the choked gasp that his mother released when she took in the state of his body. The ribbons looped around his piercings jostled slightly as she ran her fingers across the lines of rings that lined his back. He turned back when he heard the doctor return and buttoned the final few buttons, ignoring the gasp when his mother took in the bar that obstructed each of his nipples. “Just sign here and you can go, your husband and some others are waiting in the waiting room with Chenle.”

He didn’t even hesitate to sign before shoving the clipboard at the doctor and going to sprint back to the reception, though he stopped "Don't cry Mama, its not going to help you." He called before he left the room, not even sparing a glance back despite her sobs for him to come back.

His mother picked up the folded stack of papers that lay discarded on the bed and covered her mouth to fight the rising nausea as she took in its words –

“SLAVE CONTRACT

I LIU KUN, IN SOUND BODY AND MIND AND OF MY OWN FREE WILL HEREBY OFFER MYSELF IN CONSENSUAL SERVITUDE TO MY FAMILY. I AGREE TO SERVE MY FAMILY TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITY AND DEVOTE MYSELF ENTIRELY TO THEIR PLEASURES AND DESIRES. THEREFORE DENOUNCING MY OWN RIGHT TO PLEASURE AND GRATIFICATION UNLESS IT IS THE WILL OF MY FAMILY. 

I AGREE TO ALLOW MY FAMILY TO MAKE DECISIONS FOR MY OWN WELL BEING AND GIVE THEM ULTIMATE RESPONSIBILITY FOR ENSURING MY OWN SAFETY AND HAPPINESS. ACKNOWLEDGING THAT PUNISHMENTS ARE DESERVED FOR THE SAKE OF MY OWN WELL BEING AND WILL NOT BE EXCESSIVE OR UNNECESSARY.

I AGREE TO COMPLY WITH THE DESIRES OF MY FAMILY IN TERMS OF CLOTHING AND PHYSICAL APPEARANCE, AND AGREE TO UNDERGO PHYSICAL TRANSFORMATION AS A MARK OF OWNERSHIP AND DEVOTION OF OWNERSHIP TO MY HUSBAND AND FAMILY. THESE MARKS OF OWNERSHIP MUST BE PROPERLY MAINTAINED AND WORN AT ALL TIMES EXCEPT IN CERTAIN CIRCUMSTANCES E.G BREASTFEEDING.

I UNDERSTAND THAT BREAKING THESE RULES THAT I HAVE AGREED TO WILL HAVE CONSEQUENCES TO DIFFERING DEGREES OF SEVERITY AND ACKNOWLEDGE MY OWN CONSENT FOR THE INFLICTION OF PUNISHMENTS…”

-

Doyoung and Taeil sat taking in their surroundings, skittish in the pristine environment that they had been brought to. Kun sat across from them, smiling gently as Chenle mouthed at his swollen chest. 

“You must be confused.” He said gently “Don’t worry. I just wanted to talk to you about reaching ultimate happiness by leaving behind the streets, and the prostitution and the drugs.” He smiled again, a little absently as he took in the picture on the wall of his family – himself, Yangyang and Chenle at the forefront, smiling in their wedding clothes and the others stood in the back dressed to the nines for the happiest day of their lives. He’d signed himself to them that day.

He sipped his tea silently before looking back at the two of them. “I’ve met some people who are willing to help you reach your happy ending if you want that...”

The two of them nodded slightly, and Kun nodded, standing and heading to the phone. “Johnny, they’ve agreed. You can tell them to move forwards with their courting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cant believe that we've reached the end of this fic! It feels a little surreal because its been a wild ride from beginning to end, but thank you for sticking with me and reading this fic as its unfolded. I'll be posting the first chapter of the second part of this series in a few days as I'd like to finish Heavenly Body before I start another extended fic.
> 
> Thank you so much for your support and love for this fic, I hope you'll stick around for some of my coming works too!


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